King for a Day
by Israfel.R
Summary: For years Santana been fighting about her gender identity, she knows she's female but can't help to feel like a guy. She tries being, and doing, girl things but she's getting tired of pretending to be someone she's not. Transsexual!Santana Slash
1. Chapter 1

**READ ME! **

_THIS IS A TRANSGENDER!SLASH STORY_

Sup peeps, this is my new Transgender story. I know this is such an odd pairing, Santana and Kurt, but Santana is just the bisexual-female version of Puck so it can't be that odd. On dA I asked people to choose among Rachel, Brit, and Santana to be the next _victim _to be transgender and Santana won :'D

So, a new pairing is made! Hummel/Lopez (_aka Lopmel or Humpez lol_)

Possible pairings:  
Santana/Puck (Friends with benefits)  
Santana/Kurt (Maybe one-sided?)  
Santana/Britney (one-sided)

(lol love triangles)

Plus cannon

Warnings: Tons of self hate, hardcore "Christian" views of gender identity, foul language, Transsexual bashing, Gay bashing, possible smutt and so much more.

* * *

**.o0o. Santana POV .o0o.**

Today is not a good day, but then again everyday is a horrible day. Today is the last straw though; it's eating away to me as I stare at my reflection wishing to be anyone else, not just anyone though. Some guy, an actor, a hot model, hell even Puck would do good. Sighing, I place the female uniform for the Cheerios, kind of hoping it will change to a male one when I close my eyes but to be disappointed when I open them.

Wishing and hoping is for losers, I'm stuck like this forever. Scoffing at my stupid decision to get implants, an attempt to make myself normal to fit in with the other girls, I put on the Cheerio jacket, happy that it covers up the biggest mistake ever. I still frown, thinking I should just put on normal clothing, guy clothing to feel comfortable but Coach will probably yell at me. Pulling my hair back into a tight pony tail, I glare at myself.

"Santana, Britney is here." My mother yells out from downstairs.

I scream an okay, hurting my voice but liking the feeling since it gives me a deeper and huskies voice if I yell a lot, making my sound more like a guy. I jump, twirl a bit, then wrinkle my nose at my reflection. "This is the best it gets, San." I sigh, placing my shoes on, I run out of my messy room. Britney is sitting in the kitchen, smiling at everything my mother says even though Brit probably doesn't understand my mother's trashy accent. My mom thinks she's still living in the ghetto, which is so embarrassing. "Hey, B. Ready to go?" I smile, trying to push away all the thoughts of what happen upstairs.

She nods; looking me up and down, a small frown is placed on her pink glossy lips. "Artie and Puck are waiting in the car." She perks up, jumping from her seat at the thought of her boyfriend. I roll my eyes, not that I don't like Artie but he totally stole my girl so he lost points for me being nice to him unless Brit is around. My mom leaves the room, telling me to behave at school like I'm a little kid. I flip her off when her back is turn, earning a giggle from the blonde. "Oh, I also got some more money!" She takes out her Hello Kitty wallet and passes a twenty. "For the you-know-what." She hums, nodding for our little secret.

"Brit, I told you I don't need-"

"But I want to help!" She pouts, pulling me to leave the house as I place the money in my pocket. "We are besties, we have to help each other."

I wish I can kiss her. I wish I can take her away from Artie and be the only man she will think about. It's sick though, since I'm not a man and probably will never be. I take her hand in mine, feeling the warmth of her soft hands as I squeeze and pull her outside, we rush to Puck's truck. Britney sitting with her lame nerdy boyfriend in the back as they share a sicking sweet kiss and giggle, I roll my eyes as Puck gives me a look that reads "I know you are jealous." I flip him off as a hello. I need to punch someone.

"I hope Rachel is sick today." I groan, getting comfortable in the sit, watching the world flash by as Puck speeds to school.

"Why's that?" Puck chuckles.

"I fucking hate that bitch." I look at my nails, seeing they are growing a bit long as I am trying to keep them short to at least have my hands like a guy. "I swear, if I hear one more time about how she is not getting a solo Imma smack her."

Puck lets out a roar of laughter, slapping the wheel and speeding up making my fear for my life. Artie yells at Puck which calms him down. "Anyways, Rachel been mellow out since her and Finn broke up." Puck takes a deep breath. Oh yeah. I smirk at the thought. "Which was kind of a bitch thing to do, San."

"So?" I raise an eyebrow at him.

"Just saying, we could have lost sectionals cause of that mess."

"If Hudson kept it in his pants, it wouldn't have been a problem." I huff, crossing my legs at the memory. It hurt a bit realizing what I am doing to myself, I'm gonna make myself go insane with all this. "He sucked in bed anyways."

"Ah, you like them like Puckzilla?" Puck nudges me.

"Ew. No." I glare at him, "You guys have no idea to please the female body."

"Ouch!" Britney giggles, jumping in her seat.

"Point for Santana!" Artie laughs, patting Puck's seat. "Dude, I am sorry but that was a pwnage right there."

"That's why you always come for more." Puck growls, trying to redeem himself.

Artie and Britney say a long oh, also if trying to get us to fight more. I laugh though, "You wish. I only come back cause you last a minute longer than everyone else."

"Aww, thank you." Puck pinches my still crossed legs.

"Fuck you." I flip him off once more, really getting angry at the thought of sex as a woman now.

**.o0o.**

"YOU BITCH!" I scream, pulling off my jacket throwing it away from me not caring if it gets dirty or lost. "I will kill you! Get back here!" I run after Jew-fro as he cries, running as fast as he can to get away from me.

"Santana!" Someone grabs my arm to pull me back, my back hitting their chest as another person tries to hold me back and Mercedes getting my my face as I struggle to get free.

"Aw hell nah, you better not be trying to get in a fight." Mercedes places both hands on my shoulders. "He did nothing anyways."

"He called me a fucking dyke in those blogs!" I scream, struggling to get free. "I'm so going to cut his dick off and stick them down his throat! YOU BETTER FUCKING HIDE, LOSER!" I scream after the guy who is long gone. I take a deep breath, calming myself. "Okay, let me go. I'm done." I sigh, shrugging off Mercedes and whoever else is touching me. I turn to see the shock faces of many losers of McKinley and the guys of glee... All of them where holding me back. I grin at the feeling of knowing I totally kick ass. "So, what's for lunch?" I brush off the wrinkles on my uniform and fitting the length of the skirt, pushing it down more as I feel uncomfortable.

"You just tried to kill someone and you want to know what's for lunch?" Sam ask, clearly confused. "You're like a serial killer."

"You're point?" I snap at him, "Look, Lady Lips, I'm hungry! Maybe I need some food in my body after I try killing people, it's normal."

"Just not the part when you try to kill someone." Mike mutters, he looks away from my glare.

I roll my shoulders, grabbing my jacket from some nerd who was sniffing it as I shove him into a locker and make my way to the cafeteria for some food. Man, I hope they are serving chicken nuggets. Before I go through the door, Britney gives me a look. Uh oh, she wants to talk to me. Sighing, I follow my friend through the halls. She pulls me into the ladies room, looking around making sure we are the only ones here, which I thank god she does, then turns giving me a stern look.

"You need to stop getting into so many fights." The blonde frowns pouting a bit. "This is like your fifth fight today. Why are you like this?" I sigh, turning around to look at myself in the mirrors. Growling in disgust, I turn away. This must have been a huge hint to Britney as she takes my hands in hers. "Is it because if your problem."

I let out a short, humorless laugh. "Yeah, actually yeah it is the reason. I'm just angry all the time and I need a way to let it out."

"But you shouldn't be causing fights!" She stomps her feet. "You need to talk it out! I saw it on Sesame Street! It's healthy this way." I groan, leave it to Brit to bring in a little kids show. "Ah! I know! Kurt is like you!"

"What? No!" I gasp, "Are you insane? Kurt is just gay, not trans. Totally different!"

"But he has a girly face." she says all innocent like, "And I know at those gay channels gays and your kind are always together! So, he orally understands!"

"I highly doubt it, B."

"Please? For me? Just tell him? I can't be the only one who knows this, I'm still confused."

Honey you will always be confused.

It was nerve wrecking to come out to Britney, but in the end it wasn't that bad since she was so clueless about being a transsexual meant but she keep her promise to never bring it up when around a lot of people. I didn't need rumors on being a Tranny, it will ruin my life. Being gay is hard enough in Ohio, imagine being trans. I could be killed, but I'm way too badass to get hurt anyways. Maybe it will do me some good to tell Kurt. Sure we never been on friendly terms but he does understand being different. On the plus side he goes to a different school so he can't blab about it either. "Fine." I sigh out, "I'm doing this for you though."

"Yay!" She grabs me into a fierce hug that knocks the air out of me. She then takes her cell out and hands it over. "Call him."

"Ummm... What?" I gap at her. No way I'm telling life important events on the phone. She gives me a cute attempt at a glare. Rolling my eyes, I take it from her. Damn, Britney is lucky I still have a thing for her. Going through her contacts, I call Kurt silently wishing he doesn't pick up but I should have known better that wishing does nothing for me ever.

"Hello? Brit, I'm busy right now."

I take a deep breath, "Hey Hummel."

**.o0o. Kurt POV .o0o.**

Blaine is every gay man's dream. Seriously, listening to him sing makes me melt so many ways and makes my heart pound cater and faster as if to burst. I'm totally in love with him! Finally! In love with a gay guy! I just got to play it cool for now on and try to get the message across I want him without seeming desperate. Blaine says something funny to us, I totally miss it but I laugh anyways letting it end with a dreamy sigh as I stare into those brown eyes.

My cell goes off ruining the perfect moment. Checking to see who I can just ignore, I frown seeing Britney calling me. This is odd, she hasn't called me ever. Only time was the short-lived moments of us dating.

"Hello? Brit, I'm busy right now." I sigh into my cell, staring at Blaine who smiles warmly at me. God that boy is pretty.

"Hey, Hummel." A slightly deeper voice answers, who is totally not Britney...

"Who is this?" I frown, turning my body away so I'm not staring at Blaine.

"Wow, I'm so hurt. It's Santana." A bitchy reply comes through. "Sorry, I didn't mean to snap." She sighs.

Whoa... Something is up. "Is something wrong?" Santana doesn't reply. I almost think she hung up but I hear a sigh from her instead. Standing up, I motion to the guys I am leaving. Blaine frowns but watches me go. Aww! He wanted me to stay! "What's up? You're kind of freaking me out." I walk to my room, smiling at the people I walk by.

"It's Britney's idea for me to talk to you." She lets out a sigh again, "She thinks I should talk to some within the community." I can tell she is rolling her eyes at that.

"And what community is that?"

"LGBT one." She laughs without humor.

"Oh..." Awkward...

"Can we talk in person? Coming out like this is not cool and I'm a nerves wreck right now and is in need to punch someone out."

"Um... Sure? We can meet at the mall; it's half away for both of us."

"True... See you at five?"

"Sure."

She doesn't even say bye as I hear the tone of the call ended. Frowning, I stare at my cell trying to figure out what just happen. Is... Is Santana coming out as a lesbian? This is weird.

A soft knock hits my door, shaking off thoughts of the Latina, I open it to see my crush smiling at me. Oh Blaine, how I just want to jump you right now.

**.o0o.**

Even though I'm only meeting Santana, I make sure I'm dress to impress as you never know who you can run into at the mall. Sitting inside at the entrances, I look at my cell to see the time.

She's late.

Sighing, I fit my shirt as a few girls look at me and giggle. Ugh, look all you want girls, I'm gay. I glance around trying to find the Hispanic girl but frown when I don't see her. This better not be some kind of joke. I could be using this time to get with Blaine! I stare at my cell once more, glaring at the numbers.

"You don't look good when glaring." A voice causes me to jump, as I look up to see Santana. She smirks, knowing she made me jump. I glare at her then notice her clothing. I hardly ever saw her in normal attire for this is quite odd. Mostly since her clothing is rather androgynous, I would assume she would whore herself. "Like what you see?" She laughs, placing her hands in her black sweater's pockets.

"No." I scoff, "Though I wonder who you are taking fashion advice from."

"From normal teenagers." She glares at me, pulling her rainbow knitted beanie down a bit to cover her hair. "At least I look cool." She crosses her arms, "And it's cheap."

"Honestly, you look like a hobo."

"Oh fuck you, Hummel!" She flips me off.

"Oh you wish, bitch!" I growl, standing up. "I don't need this. I'm going back to school."

"Wait!" Britney comes over, with candy in her hands as I didn't realize her as she stood at the candy store nearby. "San is being a meanie cause of her problem… What's it called?"

Santana slaps her forehead, "Not now, Brit."

"But you promise!"

"I will tell him, just chill. Go to build-a-bear."

"Oooh! They have that here?" She runs off to find the store, leaving a pissed of girl with me.

I stare at Santana who was taking deep breaths, looking around as if someone was probably following her, which I hope not. "We should follow her so she doesn't get lost." The brunette sighs, folksinger her friend as I tag along. "Anyways, if we move and I tell you no one can hear."

"Honestly, Santana, being gay is not bad." I place my hand on her arm. "Guys love lesbians, you have it easier." I say trying to lighten the mood.

"I'm not a fucking lesbian, Hummel!" She pulls her arm away from me like I was fire. I gasp at her, putting a bit distance from her. People stop and stare at us as Santana frowns as she notices what happen; she rubs the bridge of her nose and sighs. "Sorry, sorry for being a douche. I'm just like… Scared." She looks up at me, her brown eyes wide. "I told Brit but she is so confused on deep meaningful things, that's why she wanted me to tell you, plus the whole community thing."

"I'm confused right now." I take a small step back to her, feeling a bit bad for her.

Santana laughs, "Yeah, well I would be too if a bitch starts rambling." She takes a deep breath once more, stopping in her path as I stop before her. "Kurt... I haven't told anyone but Britney." I nod, taking note that this is serious. "I'm... I'm a boy." I blink at her in confusion, she frowns at this. "Wait, better wording." She laughs nervously. "I'm a Transsexual."

"Oh."

Didn't see that one coming.

_TBC?_


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Thanks for the wonderful reviews! They make my day! For Anon who wonder if there will be Brittana, sorry to say but no. Brit is dating Artie and she is happy in the show with him, and come on that's her first boyfriend… I think… But Santana does have feelings for her, reason why it's a one-sided Brittana.

Reviews are love~ So send me some... I'm lonely... lol

* * *

**.o0o. Kurt POV .o0o.**

"Oh." What the hell? Oh? That all you say when a girl tells you that she's actually a he? "How... Are you..."

"Yeah, I'm sure." Santana shrugs likes it no big deal. "I've known forever, kind of like you being gay. Only time I had a problem was when puberty hit and my parents had issues with me acting like a guy." She sighs, looking into the Build-a-bear watching Britney with a close eye.

"I'm sorry if this is kind of rude but," I pause, unsure if I should ask why she got a boob job instead of a reduction. I mean doesn't it cost the same? I inhale deeply, "Why the boob job then?"

A flash of emotions flash on her face, mostly anger but win a hint of pain. "I... I was trying to be a normal girl. That's what girls want... For their sixteen birthday, a boob job not a reduction. My mom was so happy when I asked for it." she lowers her head, pulling at her sweater which I realize is to make sure you can't tell she has a breast. "Anyways..." She sighs, not looking up, "I don't want to seem like a freak crying in the middle of a mall. What a loser, right?" She looks up with a forced smile on her face.

"Um, well it's good you told me." I say, fixing my hair even though it is perfect "You'll have someone to talk to that is more..." I trail off trying to think of a good word.

"Sane?" Santana laughs, grinning at me.

"I meant understanding, but sane is good too. Just remember you said that." I smile, happy to see that her good mood is coming back. Not that I ever saw her in a good mood, but she seems really relaxes and calm. Not so much like evil, bitch Santana. I wonder if that was the reason she was always angry. "I'll try to use male pronouns for now on and if you have a male name, I will call you by that too."

"Just not around people from McKinley." She... I mean, he sighs. "I'm not ready for that yet. Though I really want to stay a Cheerio but use the male uniform, I think I'll look hot in that. I mean, you looked cute, so I can rock it."

Wait did she, I mean he, say I looked cute? Mentally shaking my head, I smile I her, him. "Maybe Sue will let you?"

Santana shrugs, smiling still though. "I should get going... Homework and my mother will flip out if I'm not home soon. She thinks I'm at Britney's. She wouldn't let me out dressed like this if she knew I'm was hanging at the mall."

"Your mom seems-"

"Like a total bitch?" He interrupts me. Whoa... I didn't have to correct myself this time, nice. "Cause she is." Santana grins at me, then pats my arm. "Well, peace. I'll text you, I guess, so you better answer me or I'm coming to your school and punching you." He then playfully punches my arm, which still hurts. Wow, Santana is strong. "Brit! Let's go!" He yells, moving into the store, "I'll buy you a bear another day."

Britney skips over to us, smiling. "Promise?"

"Yeah, yeah." Santana blushes, but tries to play it off by looking away from the oblivious blonde.

I wonder if Santana still likes Britney. Huh, weird.

"Bye bye, Kurtie!" Britney rushes over to me, giving me a huge hug. "I want to kiss you but I'm dating Artie." She pouts, Santana is rolling her, ugh I already messed up, eyes in the background. I laugh though, finding it cute that Britney is really loyal on dating.

**.o0o.**

Once I got back to Dalton, Blaine wanted to know what I was doing for some gossip. I couldn't tell him that I was meeting Santana whom was telling me she is now a he, it would be wrong to out him like that. So, I tell Blaine I was meeting some friends cause I missed them. Blaine laughed, asking if the Mohawk guy, Puck, was there. I give me a look and realize Blaine thinks Puck is hot. I mean, you have to be blind not to think Puckerman is but he is straight and annoying. Grinning, I tease Blaine about his crush and internally frown that Blaine has a crush on him and not me. Great, the only gay guy I meet is crushing on a straight dude. I swear this only happens to me.

Thinking back to Santana, I wonder if she still likes guys. It's a bit odd if she wants to be a boy but she still likes guys. She should just stay a girl if she likes guys, her life will be so much easier. But I guess there is a reason for that then, plus it's just rude to ask her. Santana needs a friend who can understand her problem. While I am not transgender, we are parting the same community like Britney had stated to her. The LGBT community needs to stick together, so I will try to be a friend to Santana as much as I can.

Santana really needs to tell me her boy name so I can get these pronouns right...

**.o0o. Santana POV .o0o.**

Glee is getting on my nerves also. I have tried to stop the fighting during school time for Britney's sake but in Glee I'm just fuming. First off, Rachel is bitchin' about her undying love for Finn whom doesn't gives a rat's ass about her at this point. It amuses and annoys me all at the same time. Second, Britney and Artie have been flirting it up all during club time. It's sickening and pissing me off since I still have feeling for her. Britney should be with me, not wheels! Third, Mr. Schue is making us sing about our emotions. How fucking gay is that? He even gives me a pointed look, like this is just for me, and tells us to be ready for next Thursdays. As Rachel bitches, Artie and Brit flirts, Puck moves closer to me grinning.

"So, want to be partners?" He says slyly, totally hitting on me.

I roll my eyes, "No." I look at my nails instead of him. "Why would I want to be your partner?"

"Well, maybe after we pick a song you can get it on with Puckzilla." He flashes a smile, one he always gives when I usually say okay. But today is different, as I scoff at him and look away to glare at Artie. "Seriously, San? We haven't done it since I got back, I need release." He moans out into my ear, turning me on. I wonder how he would moan if I was fucking him, would he sound like Britney. Nah, probably not. Maybe like those jocks in those gay pornos I watched awhile ago.

"Way to work your charms." I tell him, sarcastically. "Honestly, I'm done sleeping around. It gets boring and my hands do a better job than you."

"Not cool, girl."

I grind my teeth at the word girl. I want to snap at him, punch him in his stupid face and tell him off but I just tense up in my seat pretending it didn't happen. "Whatever." I flip him off as Mr. Schue tells us to get into groups to practice some Journey song. I might just snap at him too.

Taking a deep breath as Puck leaves me; I take out my cell and quickly text Kurt. I haven't talked to him since we met but I guess it's better than just bottling my feelings.

_OMFG I want to kill everyone. I know they don't know I'm a guy, but it's beginning to piss me off! And now Mr. S is making us sing about our fucking feelings! Ugh! KILL ME KURT! _

Placing my cell back into my jacket's pocket, I make my way down with the others as Mr. Schue directs us to dance. I half-assed my work, shoving whoever bump me except Brit of course. Mr. Schue gives me a disappointed look that I shrug off and tell him I'm not feeling well. I highly doubt he believed me but told me to just sit down and watch. I can tell Finn was happy since I did push the giant a lot. I watch them for a few more minutes; seeing Puck trying to be sexy, which he does, to seduce me, which doesn't work. I check my cell after glaring at Puck, smiling at the missed message.

_It can't be that bad, we always sung about our feelings. Plus, you're a tough guy! Sing about punching people or kicking ass?_

I chuckle at that, shaking my head and telling him:

_You are a dork... But you flatter me so it's fine. Got any kick ass songs? Nothing too gay... No offense, I might like guys but I'm not a flowery dude._

_I don't like the dork label... But as long as no one else uses it, I'm okay. And I don't know songs off the top of my head! I'm in my own Glee meeting too, they are kind of annoying._

"Hey, Glee is done." Puck pokes me; I slap his hand away though. I look up seeing everyone leaving, frowning as Artie takes Brit from me. "I was thinking if you don't want to come over, you want to go to the mall and chill?"

Is Puckerman asking me out? I almost laugh at him, but shake my head, taking pity on him. I would never go out with Puck; he wouldn't understand the whole transgender thing anyways. "Nah, my mom wants me home."

"Ew, your mom is home... When she leaving again?" Puck understands my mom is a bit crazy, but he never really met her which is good. My mom hates Puck, mainly cause of his rep and he slept with all her friends. Yeah, gross.

"Not till the summer." I inform him, standing up and giving Kurt a _LOL sucks to be you_. "She'll be gone with my dad for the entire summer then, thank god." I sigh, following Puck to his car.

"Yeah well, maybe then we can do it." Puck pouts a bit.

"Maybe." I smirk. Maybe if I get him drunk I can pop his cherry. I totally bet Puck likes to be dominated by cute boys.

The ride to my house was silent, other than the radio playing random songs that seem like they were love songs. Puck and I sing some of them, but other than that we talked about nothing else. Even when he dropped me off, we didn't say anything. He speed away as I watch his truck zoom off. Sighing, and not wanting to go inside, I drag my feet to my house.

The moment I open the door, the sound of the Christian channel playing in the living room greets me. I contain my groans as I walk to the kitchen for a quick snack. My mom was there trying to make dinner. Oh gawd, kill me. My mother cannot cook to save her life. Luckily my father stays at work late and eats at his job. I frown as I watch my mother make the chicken, adding Adobo at it and nothing else. I tell her hi, not even trying to sound happy or girly, which causes her to tell me off to be more womanly. Rolling my eyes, I take the pudding and rush up stairs before she makes me watch the stupid TV show of hers. Just another thing I need in my life, some fat asshole to tell me I am going to hell no matter what.

Dropping onto my bed, I change into the clothing I keep out for once I get home. Just some plaid blue PJ pants, a random black shirt, and a sweater to somewhat conceal my chest. I look into the mirror kind of liking myself, expect for my long hair, frowning I pull it out of the high tail and shake it out and mess it up. I smile once more, almost laughing as I look like a boy but please with the outcome. Glancing around my room, I find my rainbow beanie. Grinning, I place it on looking at myself to see if I look more male now.

I smile, really happy, as I make loser cute poses at myself. Wanting a second opinion, I take a photo of myself from my cell and send it to Brit. I wouldn't send it to Kurt because it is a bit odd and I seriously cannot stand that boy. Okay, yeah I texted him first and kind of had a flirting going on but Kurt is annoying, but not like Rachel annoying though. Kurt thinks he is all that and he is not; he acts like everyone should bow down to him. It is really annoying. Shaking my head, I jump at the sound of my cell. Looking at it, I grin to see Britney texting. That she loves how cute I look and I make a really cute boy. I smile fondly at that but frown at knowing she is dating Artie. Ugh, if only they weren't dating! Britney and I make a better couple anyways! Who the hell would think Wheels and her would be cute? Huh!

Maybe... Kurt and... Whoa! Back the fuck up, dude. Kurt and I? Yeah, then all of the sudden Quinn and Rachel are gay for each other, all the guys in Glee are having an orgy, and Dave Karofsky is a flaming homo. I bet Kurt wouldn't even think of dating a transguy, much less a pre-everything one. Kurt is gay and at this state I'm too girly. I frown at that, knowing I cannot date for real tell after I get on hormones.

Well, it can't hurt to ask advice from Kurt. Plus it'll harden our bond, or some gay shut like that, I have no idea... I heard Britney repeat it from God knows what. Sighing, I click send while biting my lips. I only get a few moments till it rings again, which Kurt's reply.

_You look like a hipster :I_

I laugh out loud, wondering if my mother heard that but not caring much.

_Well, do I look okay at least?_

Not that I care what he thinks, seriously. Kurt just knows his stuff on fashion, it's best to ask him.

_Of course. You have the basic idea of what clothing helps and looks good. Honestly, what you wore to see me was a good outfit too. Very androgynous. _

Hmm...

_Do you want to hang out again? Just me and you? Test out my manliness? ;) We can check out hot guys and make fun of random people, maybe catch a movie?_

I send it, instantly freaking out. Maybe Kurt doesn't want to hang out with one of the people that made his life hell... I mean, that's only normal. Second changes mean nothing in the real world.

_Sure, maybe do some shopping too? This weekend good? I have a test tomorrow._

Grinning, I bounce on my bed. "Awesome!"

"Santana, who are you talking to?" The voice of my mother causes me to jumps as I whip my head to my door seeing my mother glare at me. "It's not Puck is it?" See, my mom doesn't trust me on anything. I mean, do I give her a reason too? Nah, I honestly fuck up my life a lot, but I only do it to prove some crazy point that I can do whatever I want and I'll be okay. Well, it sounds good to me at least.

"No, I'm talking to Brit." I lie easily, not even feeling bad about it. "We want to go to the movies this weekend… Will that be okay?" I give my best puppy eyes that my dad falls for, my mom not so much…

"If you do all your homework." She gives me a look of untrustingness, yeah… Not a word. Shut the fuck up, I made it up cause I am so badass. "But you can't sleep over her house; we have church in the morning." She says before she leaves, crushing my spirit a bit.

Sighing, I look back at Kurt's text.

_This Saturday is great, just look out for the hot Latino._

_TBC?_


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: omg… I had the worst writer's block while writing this… I don't even like this chapter. I suck at writing "hang out scenes"… Next chapter is gonna be better! I PROMISE!

_Please review~ They make my day less shitty~_

* * *

**.o0o. Kurt POV .o0o.**

It takes me over an hour to get ready. My roommate, Luke, thought it was funny as he thought I was going on a date with some hot guy. It wasn't a date. Santana might be a guy but it's just weird... I have no idea how I feel about it actually. While i don't want to seem like a mean guy, to me she is still a girl cause that is what i see when i look at her, and when i hear her name I think of a girl... Not boy...But she needs a friend, someone to make her feel normal and not a freak. While I have the support of friends and family, Santana is sill new to the whole idea of being out. And even though our friends are the same, liking a gay person doesn't mean you like transgender ones. I am willing to change my mind for her.

Looking down at my watch, I groan realizing she is late... Once again. Will she ever be on time? Rolling my eyes, I send her a text that I will be in the food court. She responds with a sad face saying she is sorry. I don't answer back as I get a salad. I should have eaten when I was at my dorm, wasting money on food even though Dalton is expensive. I feel bad for leaving McKinley to us my father's money to hide from Dave. In all honesty, I am scared he will kill me. Stabbing my food as if it was that stupid jocks head, I eat the food but stop midway of the fork reaching my mouth as I see her... I mean him.

Santana smirk as she made her way over to me. She looks like a guy; really you couldn't tell if she is a girl since she does look like a gay guy. I mean, he... Ugh, this is harder than I thought. He sits before me, still smiling. "When I was walking up here, tons of girls looked at me like they want me." He giggles, pleased with himself. I find it weird that he's wearing glasses though, the nerdy ones that got back into style. He pushes them back up his nose.

"What's with the glasses?"

"To conceal my face more, just in case someone from school sees me though won't notice me at first glance." He shrugs, then his face lights up. "Oh!" He puts his hand before him for a shake. "I'm Travis Lopez."

I give him an odd look, like Santana just went insane but then laugh at myself for realize what he means. "Nice." I smile, giving him his hand shake. "Who choose it?"

"Not Brit, she wanted something like Harry Potter." He wrinkles his nose, "It was kind of cute to ask for help. I was looking through my iPod and I just choose it cause it seems like me." I open my mouth to give a side comment but he gives me a pointed look, "No, I don't need a Spanish name."

I giggle, "I was going to say it suits you."

Then he does something I have never seen him do, Travis blushes. It is really adorable as his face flushes with the blood rushing to his cheeks. Wait... It's not adorable! What am I thinking? Travis smiles, "Thanks."

An awkward silent rolls in. I try to finish my food while sneaking glances at Santana... I mean Travis. A few girls walk pass us giggling, Travis turns his body to them as I see a flirty smile place on his lips. He gives them a wave, which causes the girls to giggle loudly and rush away. Oh God... "You are such a player." I shake my head, "Like Puck."

That earns me a laugh, "Damn straight. Though I am way sexier than him." He hums, turning to me still smiling. Honestly, I never saw Santana... Ugh, Travis smiles a lot. "And I know how to please the ladies." He says rather loudly, making the group of girls turn and giggle more. Travis doesn't even turn to know they were giggling at him. I shake my head at that. "Anyways, let's go get some shopping done."

**.o0o.**

I continue to laugh as Travis giggles next to me, causing the store clerks to give us odd looks. For the first time it wasn't the odd looks of being flamboyant that makes them glare at me, it was Travis crude jokes and surprising stories about a drunk Puck that cause the workers to stare at us like freaks.

"I swear, Puck is ultra gay when he is high and drunk." He giggles, looking through the clothing. "He started to put on make-up and tried walking in high heels."

"No way!" I gasp for air. "Manly Puck would never."

"I swear on my life, dude, he must be at least bisexual! Maybe if he is only drunk but still!" Travis laughs out loud, as some older ladies gives him look. He notices but just smirks it off. "Anyways, how is Dalton? The lead singer at Sectionals is kind of hot, I'd tap that."

I giggle at him, but nodding in agreement. "It's a great school, but I miss you guys so much." I sigh, "And wearing normal clothing, those uniforms are getting boring to wear every day."

"Ha, they wouldn't for me. I kind of have a school boy, girl, fetish." Travis grins, touching everything that is shiny in his path as we leave the store. "I don't think I would be able to last long."

"That's just wrong... You wear the Cheerio uniform every day."

"And that's why I am always horny. All my text messages are sexting with Puck."

"Ugh! My brain, Trav! I do not need to imagine that!" I playfully smack his arm as he giggles next to me while fixing his glasses.

"Cause it's too hot for you to imagine without jizzing?"

I gasp at him, seeing a group of girls giggling at us. "Seriously stop!" I try to hold back my laugh, but fail. "What am I going to do with you?" I shake my head as we continue to walk randomly in the mall.

"I can think of a few things." He winks at me. He... He is totally not flirting with me. Nope, no way. "Anyways," He takes out his cell glaring. "Time to go home, my mum will flip out."

**.o0o. Travis POV .o0o.**

I walk Kurt to his car, passing him his bags as he opens the car. "This was really fun." I grin out, leaning closer to the taller boy. "I wonder why we never hanged before..." Kurt giggles and shakes his head as I groan. "Never mind, I know why." I pat his back softly. "So, I was wondering if you want to meet up with Brit and I to see a movie next week." I smile at him.

"If you keep inviting me to these outings, I'm going to start to think you like me, Travis." Kurt jokes, I think at least and not really care if he is not, leaning back on the car door.

"Well, Brit and Artie have a date night but B invited me and I don't like Artie so much so I said yes." I shrug as Kurt shook his head, "You would have to call me Santana but I'll dress like a guy, minus the ace bandages though." I pout out, crossing my arms.

"I would have to see if I'm free." I tried to ignore the heartbreak as Kurt says this. "But if nothing is up, I will text you to confirm." He smiles gently.

I open my arms for a hug, "Well, see ya later."

When Kurt enters my embrace and holds me, I feel so giddy like a little school boy getting his first bike. I lean closer as I bring my face into his neck and inhale the sweet scent of fruits. Oh jeeze, he is so gay. I love it. I pull back, a satisfy smile on my lips causing Kurt to blush as he says good bye and goes into his car.

I rush to my own realizing my mom is gonna flip the fuck out.

**.o0o.**

Yup, she flipped out.

The moment I got home, I had taken off the ace bandages and put on a push up bra while in the car before with some girly tank top, my mother started to yell at me. At first I thought it was for wearing jeans but when I look down I remember these are girl jeans anyways. She went off on me on why I was late, by ten fucking minutes, and I tried to calmly tell her the movie went over the time but she didn't want to hear any of it. I almost freaked out on her but I went up stairs without yelling.

I felt the need to rebel against her, so now all I am doing is sexting with Puck trying to imagine sex would be like as a guy. It wasn't hard to fantasize about it, but once my hands started to roam on my lower parts... Well, I was in a much needed position to try and remove myself mentally from masturbating. It is really annoying, too. In the end I couldn't get off since my mind keep rushing over to Kurt, and it felt weird to think of him when I touch myself, so I told Puck he sucked and turn my cell off.

Other than Berry, what I hate more than anything is to be sexually frustrated... I am going to be such a bitch tomorrow...

Groaning, I try to fall asleep.

**.o0o.**

"Santana, please calm down." Mr. Schue moves into my line of vision so I don't see that Jewish loser. "I know you and Rachel don't get along but-"

"Look, I find it unfair she gets solos all the time! I only got one! Why can't I get more! Hell, why not Tina?" I point to the goth freak, yelling to not only get rid of my frustration of Berry but for everything else in my life. And honestly, it feels fucking great to just yell.

"Well, how about we plan a song that Tina or you can-"

"I want to sing with her." I cross my arms, "A duet, some kind of love song or something."

"Wait what!" The Asian girl yells, standing up. "I am not singing a love-"

"You sang I kissed a girl, man up loser." I glare at her, licking my lips, then turn my gaze to our teacher. "I don't see anything wrong with two girls singing together as if Berry and Frankenteen would."

"Santana," Mr. Schuester starts of slowly, "It is different than them singing."

"That's very homophobic, Mr. Schue." I say bluntly, "I want to sing with a girl for my emotional piece, what's so wrong with that?" I cross my arms, "You know what? Fuck this, I'm out." I storm out of the stupid room and kick the door to open as I let out a growl.

Once I get outside, I realize I need a ride home. Not letting myself pout, I cross my arms and start the long walk home. I wonder if I scream a few more times would I feel any better, but instead of trying it out I let it bottle up.

I wonder what Kurt is doing on this fine day.

_TBC?_


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: At first I wasn't gonna update so soon buuuuuuut you guys reviewed and I just had epic cake so here you go~

* * *

**.o0o. Travis POV .o0o.**

I wonder why people no one ask me what is wrong with my life, why I am such an angry person. I see people go to Quinn when she seems depress, cooing her with words of encouragement. Why doesn't anyone do the same for me? Britney use to, before she and Wheels got together. She doesn't even seem to care anymore. Puck doesn't care, either. All he wants is sex, and while I am horny I don't want to have sex as a girl anymore. No one cares about Santana... No. No one cares about Travis.

I am just a bitch.

A big jerk that steals boyfriends, makes people hate themselves, and flaunts my power as being popular. I should change; I want to change before I hurt myself and others too much. I want real friends who will love me and watch over me. I just want these things so badly; I can't see others whom have it without it breaking my heart. I need these things so much, and there is no way I can get it.

Wait, that's a lie. I have Kurt.

We started out as hating each other but somehow Britney has made up friends. He sees me as a guy, he treats me as a guy, and maybe he can love me as a guy.

Oh hell no! Love? Who am I kidding! He wouldn't love someone like me! I made his life hell before! Plus... I am incomplete...

"Are you sure." My mother's voice causes me to jerk out of my thoughts. I nod, firmly. She lets out an annoyed sigh like this is clearly my fault. And maybe it all my fault. I just had to feel like this, to want to be normal but in the end I cannot fight who I truly am. "Fine." she crosses her arms, "But we are not removing the whole thing."

"Why not?" I almost smack myself for saying that.

She gives me a detest look. "Woman have breast, Santana." I almost flinch at her words. "We can reduce them but I am not paying for you to become a freak."

Biting my lips, I just nod and leave the room to be all alone in my bedroom. I walk up the stairs hearing my mother complain on how I am not normal... A freak.

That is what I am. It is why no one wants to come over to me and ask why I am the way I am. They know I am a freak. Maybe not because I'm a digesting tranny. Maybe it is because I am such a bitch for no reason. Who knows! It can be for so many reasons why no one truly cares about me.

Not even Kurt will care about me.

Ugh, here we go again. Kurt is just sneaking in on my thoughts.

Locking my door, I pull my shirt off. I stare at the lumps on my chest, glaring at them in hopes they just disappear. But they don't, if anything staring at them makes me hate my body more. Placing my hands over my chest, I try a cover the size C cups, smiling that if I do this my body looks a bit like a boys. My nice cut abs I work on ever day, not like Sam's though I wish I can have his body so much, the muscles on my arms from lifting weights which are clearly not as impressive as Puck's, and finally the illusion of not having boobs. Smiling, I wonder if Kurt like boys that are lean. Or maybe he likes his boys like Puck and Sam, since his last crushes were Finn and Sam. If I were a real boy I don't think I would win against them since I am clearly skinnier. I wish I had more manly muscles.

My cell rings Sweet Dreams as I grin pulling my cell out of my skirt. "Why hello there, Mr. Hummel, what do I owe this fabulous call for?" I tease, opening my closet to find a random loose shirt to wear. Picking some Coke Cola shirt, I place it on and shimmy my way out of my skirt and into some boxers.

"Mr. Lopez." He practically purrs into the phone, making me giggle a bit. Oh sweet god, something is wrong with me. "I am calling to see how it went with your mom." I groan at the thought of what had happen, and frown at the depressing thoughts that followed it. "That bad?" The flirty and cheerful voice is gone and replaced with concern. My chest gets this odd feeling as if something smooth is washing over me, it's a nice feeling but I just can't place what it means

"Sorta." I frown, "I asked for the reduction and she said yes. She made it sound like I am a freak for wanting it done." I bit my lips at the memory. "I stupidly ask her if I can get them removed and she called me freak pretty much."

"Trav, you are not a freak." He mutters into my ears. "If you were I wouldn't be talking to you." He jokes, which I do laugh even though it wasn't that funny. I just don't want him worrying about me. "So, when are you getting it done? Do you want me to come over?"

"Spring break." I sigh, lying on my bed. "I would like it if you can come over but my mother is pretty homophobic... And no offense but you are kind of flamboyant." That earns me a giggle; I smirk at the knowledge of making Kurt laugh a lot recently. "Brit is gonna come by, but maybe of that weekend my mother will be at work."

After all the talk of breast reductions, we talk about mostly anything we can think of. From glee, a little bit of fashion, TV shows and boys. While I do think Kurt sees me as male, sometimes I feel like maybe he doesn't when we have these boy talks. He has seen me in a dress, dresses that show off my cleavage, honestly for if I wasn't Trans I would have a hard time seeing people as the gender they say they are. In the background on Kurt's side I hear tons of clicking.

"Are you on the computer?"

"Yes."'He hums, "How did you know?"

"You type really fast and loud." I laugh, "Does your school have Internet protection?"

"Travis... I am not looking up that. I have a roommate!"

"Oh really?" I sit up, "Is he that cute leader from your Glee club?" Kurt groans, muttering I am a perv which I laugh at. He informs me that his roommate is not this Blaine guy, since he is a year older than him. "Ugh, fine. You suck, Hummel."

"Well, I am gay."

"Oh, you are very sly."

We continue to talk about random things, sometimes not even talking while we both are on the computers. Is it weird we didn't talk for ten minutes but stood on the phone and hearing each other breathe? Well, while on the computer no duh. While all that is fun in my life needs to come to an end, my mother comes in giving me looks and asking who I was talking too. I lied saying I was talking to Quinn about Cheerios but my mother didn't even care as she yells at me to hang up. Kurt seemed heartbroken as he heard my mother yelling non-stop like a crazed woman she is, but tells me to have sweet dreams as I causally say peace.

I wish I could have said something more romantic.

Wait, what?

**.o0o.**

I tried not being a bitch in school, I honestly did. I counted to ten in my head a few times if someone, or something, pissed me off a bit too much; but in the end it was not enough to hold back my wrath. It wasn't my fault though, believe me when I say this, some skank thought she can bad mouth me behind my back and I wouldn't hear it. Huge fucking mistake on her part; the whore deserved it and more.

I broke her nose, her blood was everywhere; on my fist, covered her white shirt, the floors pooled with it... Okay, not pooled... But it was epic! Puck, Sam, and Mike had to hold me back, and even then I was in so much rage they couldn't hold me down.

I know what you are thinking, "But Travis, what did she say?"

She called me slut! That is the old me, I haven't slept with anyone this year! Well, I did with Puck but he doesn't count. I was already angry beforehand. My mother reminding me that I'm a girl, tons of hot guys treating me like a girl, being fucking horny and can't do shit to get off, and I got a fucking C on my math test I studied my ass off for! So yeah, I had some built up rage in me!

Figgins' sighs in total disappointment with Mr. Schue to my left and Coach on my right. "You're behavior has worsen, Miss. Lopez." I growl at the female pronoun. "To hurt that girl to that extreme is uncalled for! I will have to call your parents to discuss what will happen to you, so far I am thinking of expelling you!"

"Wait, what!" I jump out of my seat, "Not fair! Tons of guys do the same thing to others but I get expelled?" I glare at my stupid principal.

"There is blood everywhere, Santana!" He shouts, "If not expelling you, you will not be able to go to any sports or activities meaning no Glee or Cheerios!"

I sit back down, my mouth open in shock. This is unfair! The jocks would push, shove, and fight other guys but one fucking girl gets into a fight she gets expelled? See, already guys have it better than girls! "This is sexist." I mumble, pulling at my skirt ends.

"While I don't believe in violence," Coach starts as I let out a scoff, "Lopez does have a point. You let the boys off with warnings but then you choose her to get expelled? Might as well expel everyone then." Awesome! Coach is on my side! "I propose In-School-Suspension."

Ugh... I hate ISS... it's like being suspended from school but you stay in a room all day and do your classwork there... By yourself, with a teacher watching you... It sucks. But it is a hundred percent better than being expelled!

"I will have to think about it." Figgins muses over the idea, "For now, you will go to Miss. Pillsbury office for the rest of the school day."

Eh, whatever, better than going home.

Getting up I drag myself to the guidance office. Trying to not think of the stares and whispers from my peers as I make this short journey that feels incredibly long as hell. Looking up, I see Ms. P cleaning her desk with such force I have a feeling she is gonna break the desk. The red head looks up, smiles as she sees me and motions me in. Groaning, I make my way in there for the first time in my whole life. I am not one to dump my problems on others, reason why I didn't want to come out at first, so sitting before a school shrink makes me feel uneasy.

"So, I got the call from Figgins." She starts off slowly, watching me as I tense up. "Santana, anything you say in here will not be repeated at all." She smiles, reassuringly. I flinch at my name, but just shrug over all. If I tell her why I am acting like this, I will have to tell her I am Trans. No way can I tell her... But then again she can help... Ugh! No! Nope! Not gonna do it! She sighs, "I know you were always a mean, angry girl." Once more I flinch at that. "But the only way I can help you not be expelled if you open up, even a tiny bit can help you and me, so you can stay in school. I know you love glee and cheerleading, so if you leave you won't have that."

She has a point. I cannot believe I am going to do this. "Whatever I say will not leave this room?" I whisper, glancing up at her wide blue eyes. She nods, still smiling, which is creeping me out a bit. "And if they ask what I had said, you can just leave this one little part out... Right?"

"Of course, you can trust me."'

I sigh. My heart begins to pound too fast, as if it is ready to burst. "I... I'm transgender." I stare at my legs. "I've known for a long time and the reason why I am always snapping at people is because I can't be myself without my mother putting me down. I'm stressed out with this Dysphasia, being pretty much gay, and life at home." I shake out the rest fast, but not incoherent for Miss. Pillsbury to not understand. I don't look up at her to see whatever disgust look she might have on her face. "And I hate myself so much. I know I do horrible things and I want to change but I'm scared."

"Oh Santana." I frown at my name, my birth name. "I am not here to judge, and I support you completely." I glance up seeing that she is still smiling. "I can't imagine how hard it is, but I know with support you can make through this! I am so proud of you for telling me, also. That is very brave of you." I smile softly at her and say thanks. "I know what we can do so you wouldn't have to be expelled, lose your club activities, and not have you mother know about this."

"Thank you so much." I grin out, "I thought I was gonna be doomed or something, but you're actually kind of cool."

"Well thank you, Santana."

"Umm... Actually... Can you call me...?" I stare back into my lap, muttering. "Lopez. I don't like being called my female name."

"Oh! Well, of course! Now, why don't you run along to your class? I'm going to call Figgins and see what kind of arrangement we can do for you. Oh and take this!" She pulls out a brochure which reads:

**COMING OUT TO FRIENDS AND FAMILY!**

"For whenever you are ready, of course." She smiles.

Telling the guidance counselor thank you a few more times, I strut the halls of McKinley with confidence I thought I had lost. It feels good to have someone knowing my secret. It's like a heavy weight has been lifted up and tossed aside. Glancing at the cloaks on the walls, I am happy to see it is lunch time so I make my way to the lunch room; not caring about the people whispering behind my back. I am in need of chicken nuggets! Though before I can get into the cafeteria, I feel my cell vibrating a lot.

Groaning, I pull it out to see a text message from Kurt telling me to call him. Feeling a smile form, I rush out to the girls' restroom to make the call. I have no idea why Kurt will make me happy. I bet he only sees me as a friend. Which would make sense since he is gay; and while I am a boy, I'm not in a male body. Shaking the negative thoughts away, and realizing it is silly to "fall in love" with Kurt since I still do like Britney. She just hasn't been on my mind.

"Hey, Kurt." I feel my whole body warm up as I say his name.

"I heard you were in a fight! What were you thinking?"

Oh no... He sounds really angry.

_TBC?_

_

* * *

_

A/N: My ipod froze while writing chapt. 5 (yup... I write this on my ipod) so... that may take awhile..._  
_


	5. Chapter 5

WARNING: PORN OF THE NON-DICK SORT! Based on what I had found on the internet when researching how FtMs have sex.

Btw: Thank you for the tons of favs and alerts :3 HUGE THANKS FOR THE REVIEWS THOUGH *supermanlyrainbowglomphumphug*

* * *

**.o0o. Kurt's POV .o0o.**

"Hey, Kurt." Travis says happily, which makes me smile but then frown because of the realize why I texted him to call me.

"I heard you were in a fight! What were you thinking!" I try not to yell out as I pace my room. I was texting Mercedes, like we always do throughout the school days; when she said she had to go because Santana was in a huge fight! With a lot of blood! "Are you being expelled? Why was there a lot of blood? What were you thinking?" I screech out fast, then taking deep breaths to calm myself. Thank GaGa my roommate is not here.

"I'm... I'm sorry." All the happiness from before is drain from him, which makes me sad but then I remember why I had him call me.

"Just tell me what happened." I sigh out. So, Travis tells me his day as fast as he could. At first I was sad for him, my heart was aching when he told me about the emotions he was been bottling up for so long, things he hasn't even told me about that were grading on his mind. But then I remember why I was angry before, it gives him no right to attack people just because he is angry. "You shouldn't have done it." I inform him, trying to sound sincere. "It makes you no better than those jocks!" I almost pout, "Plus you could have been hurt!"

"It takes three football players to hold me back, I highly doubt she could have taken me." Travis clearly is pouting, which I try to hold back my laugh because I am suppose to be mad at him. "But you are right... I'm just as bad. One of my goals is to change for the better, I even told Ms. P what that. Oh, yeah! I told her I was... You know. She was pretty cool about it."

"That's great! I'm proud of you!"

"So, does that mean you'll come on date night with me?" Travis goes back to his flirty self, as I feel myself blush. It's just weird. Travis, while I respect him as a male, does have a female body. I'm gay, I like guys, but Travis doesn't have a boy body nor sounds anything like a boy. I still have the image of Santana in my head. He's making me question my sexuality! "Please." He says, for the first time ever.

"Ugh, fine." I giggle, frowning that I easily fall for his charms.

"Score!"

**.o0o.**

When I get to the room where my glee club holds the meetings at, Blaine makes his way to me with a big smile. The smile that would swoon me off my feet but lately it hasn't done that. Am I over him? Why! He is the first gay guy I have met and I don't like him anymore? He asked me about what has happen since I had to tell him that a friend of mine got into a fight in McKinley. Blaine was actually concern about the fight, which made me realize how much of a nice guy he is. I tell him that everything is fine, that the stress was too much on my friend. Blaine seems content with the price of information, as we take our seats in the back with Wes and David, telling me that I am a great friend for being concern.

Which is what I am, a friend of Travis. Nothing more; nothing less. I am gay and sure Travis is a guy but when nude that body is female.

"What's up? You seem confused." Blaine whispers pulls out of my thoughts, I glance around the room seeing we are still in the middle of the meeting.

"Just... Thinking." I frown, locking my eyes with his. Both Travis' and Blaine's eyes are brown but Travis' are much richer and so delicious.

"About?" He smirks, saying in a teasing way.

"It's kind of embarrassing and personal." I purse my lips, looking away.

"We're friends, right, can't be that bad!" He giggles; I try not to roll my eyes as I look to the front. I cave in though, pretty much desperate need of help on my sexuality. Something I thought I would never need! I tell Blaine to wait a bit after the meeting is over so we can talk. He seems to get the hint it's serious; at least it is for me. Once the meeting is over; Blaine getting another solo, wow did not see that coming, we stay back as the others rush out of the room to go on with their lives. Right when the last person leaves, Blaine looks at me and says "Spill it."

So, I do. Without giving Santana's name, just calling him Travis at both the times I refer him as male and female. Blaine nods at me, humming in thought as I tell him I am confused if I am gay since I am starting to find Travis rather attractive. I begin to pace as I tell him how hard, and weird, it is to have a crush on a biological female. "Does this make me straight?" I panic, seeing my life become something strange. Oh my GaGa!

"Travis is a guy," Blaine repeats the obvious, sorta. "He's a guy in mind but not body. You like him for his personality then, you're still gay." He places his hands on my shoulders to stop me from passing. "You're growing up!" He laughs, now patting me. "Liking someone off of personality and not looks! So, when do I get to meet this guy?"

"So... I'm still gay?" I smile, my heart pounding less, as I let out a breath I did not know I was holding.

"Sort of, maybe Queer? Or... Hmm, what is the word? Pansexual?" He tsk'd crossing his arms. "Ah, who cares! Labels are confusing." I nod in agreement. "Anyways! You didn't answer me? Do I get to meet this fabulous boy who has got you in awe?" Blaine teases, poking my arm.

Blushing, I try to picture Travis and Blaine meeting. Travis, if he is like I think, would just end up flirting up a storm with Blaine and Blaine probably would go along. In result making me jealous. Also, Travis doesn't seem like he wants people to know he is a guy... "I'm going to have to see, he's not really out yet."

"Oh... That sucks."

"Yeah..."

"Well, on the bright side, you two can make out in public and no one would care."

Oh sweet Lady GaGa, he did not just say that.

**.o0o.**

**Travis**_: I told B that you are my date; she got mad excited it was totally cute._

Ugh, I wonder if he still has feelings for her... Why does this happen to me? All the guys I like are straight! Wait, is Travis straight? Maybe bi more cause of sleeping around with guys. Ugh, whatever! He's straight as of now because he likes Britney.

_Artie is gonna find it weird_

**Travis**_: he can suck my 9 inch purple sparkle-y cock :I_

Flushing, I get a flash of an image of Travis with a strap-on peeking out of his boxers... Oh sweet Armani...

**Travis**_: Okay, it doesn't have sparkles... But whatever. _

_I do not need these images in my head!_

**Travis**_: Cause they're hot? Mmhmm, I know bby lololololol Seriously, I'm great in bed._

_WHY WOULD YOU SERIOUSLY TELL ME THAT?_

**Travis**_: It seemed right at the time. Just in case, ya know? :3_

_No... I don't. You are such a perv._

**Travis**_: :D I know~ but ANYWAYS what is Mr Hummel doing this fine, fine night? Watching any good pornos? I know some great ones I can link you!_

_... No, you sex addict! I'm looking up information of FtMs. You probably will get annoyed at me if I just keep asking things, so might as well do my part._

**Travis**_: You are smart. Hnng, I have to go! My mom is bitchin' to watch this tv show on the "Christian" channel on why I am gonna go to hell... Or something. I dunno... Save me? D: lol Byes :'3_

_It's only for awhile, don't worry! Text me if you need anything! Bye! :)_

**.o0o.**

Oh gawd, I am annoying. I reread the text messages once more, flushing at the image of him with his strap-on... I never did look up FtM porn... Glancing up, my roommate is sitting at the desk with his back to me. I place my headphones in the jack and one a new tap to Google. Typing in FtM porn, it takes me to random websites. Giggling at the Address, I open the link to the world transmale pornos; and OH MY GAGA the most MANLY MAN is all over the site but he has no cock! That's so... Odd. But not bad so far. The man is not really my type since he is bald, with tons of tattoos but other than that I do find him rather attractive. I guess its the whole jock look going for him. Looking through the videos, I frown seeing I have to pay. Going to a free porn site, I type in the name of the porn star in the search happy to see a few videos.

Making sure my headphones is in and that my roommate is still doing his work, I open the video with the man and some tan guy that kind of reminds me of Travis but with bleach blond hair. Both "actors" are trans, as they began to... Well... Do the sixty-nine. It was really odd at first, mainly that I am looking at a vagina on two guys; but when they moan it was clearly male. When camera zooms toward the tan guy's wide open legs, straight to his sex, I noticed it looks a bit different from what I had learn in school. While the tan guy is moaning, the star of the movie rubs the giant nub that I know is not that big on a female. Pausing the movie, I open a newer tab to see the side effects of taking testosterone.

The moment I lay my pc down on my lap though, I realize the video kind of turned me on...

Panicking, I open a newer tab to help me get rid of my problem with the sight of dead kittens.

Anyways, back to reading...

Ugh... Life was less confusing just being gay.

**.o0o. Travis POV .o0o.**

Running my hands over my bonded chest for the hundredth time in less than an hour, I watch Artie and Britney flirt as I roll my eyes and eat some breadsticks as I wait for my date. It's gonna be so funny when Artie sees who it is, like picture moment prefect! Looking pass the sickening couple, I stare down the door chanting for Kurt to just show up. I risk dressing like a guy just for him! I am not even wearing my normal guy clothing, I'm all fancy faggy look going on and I look hot. Tight black skinny jeans, black vans, red long sleeve shirt, black tie, and finally with a black sweater vest; and yes I know I am wearing tons of black but it's a classy colour. Wheels did give me a confused look when I first walked in but I glared at him so he stopped, other than the few confused glances.

I smile when I see the door open with Kurt coming in looking around. Standing up, I push my hair away from my face as I excuse myself from the table to my date. He doesn't see me coming, I as move closer to him. Talking his hand into mine, Kurt snaps his head at me and tenses but smiles when our eyes meet. "Hey." I try to make myself sound like a guy, the waitress looks at us while that look all fag hags have when they see two cute guys holding hands. "Glad you made it."

"You look... Very nice today." He blushes, avoiding my eyes now. "I'm surprise you didn't come in other clothing since you know."

"Oh, well even though it's a double date I want to look nice for you." I flush realizing what I just admit too. "I mean." Oh Gawd! Man the fuck up, Travis! Mentally shaking my head, i smirk at Kurt. "Plus this town needs some hot guys. I shrug, trying to shake off what I said before. I can't fall for him, he's gay and I'm technically still female. "Let us wow Artie!" I grab Kurt's soft hands, pulling him to the direction of our table. Artie and Brit backs are turn to us, whispering to each other as my best friend kisses her boyfriend on the cheek. I wonder if Kurt would let me kiss him... Wait... What? "Hey, I'm back with my sexy date."

The look on Artie's face is priceless! "Kurt!" His voice cracks a bit in shock, I let out a chuckle. "Santana," I tense a bit at the name, but no one saw since Artie's face is priceless. Though, I am still holding hands with Kurt so he squeezes my hand in a reassuring way. "Didn't mention that you guys are friends, nor her date." Four eyes looks down at our combine hands and an eyebrow raises but he says nothing on that.

I do let go of Kurt's soft hands, gesturing for him to sit as I pull his chair out. Kurt smiles at me while taking his seat. "It's a new relationship." Kurt explains, pulling out the menu. "We have gotten pretty close and she needed someone to come here with her." I wonder if it was easy for him to just change from he to she. I bet it is since he has known me as female since forever. I feel myself get down as I take my spot next to Kurt. I avoid eye contact as I glare at my breadsticks. "I do enjoy her company though, so I am glad she had asked me out."

My heart races a little as he says those words. Kurt enjoys my company! Looking up, our eyes meet and I cannot help the fact my chest warms up from the smile on his soft looking lips. "Well, I am glad you accepted." I grin out, my hand reaches for his leg so I can touch him without having everyone see it happen.

"Well, I am glad you asked." He rest his hand on mine, squeezing it and smiling happily.

Artie chokes on his water, spitting some onto my plate. I turn to glare at him, but Kurt pats my hand to calm me a bit. "Are you guys flirting?" He squeaks out, taking his glasses to dry them off. "Like seriously flirting?"

"Umm..." Kurt starts but I just interrupt getting pissed.

"Maybe, what's the matter with that?" I snap but then realize it is stupid for me to get offended when I am not a real guy. I remove my hand from Kurt's and place it on my own lap feeling awkward and angry at myself. What was I thinking on going on a date with Kurt? He's gay, everyone with eyes or ears can tell and everyone who sees and hears me knows I'm a girl. Frowning, I bite into my bread stick waiting for the waitress to serve us. Kurt keeps sending me looks, but I ignore them to wallow in my depression. He deserves a real guy to be his first boyfriend; I mean I know we aren't together but if we end up being more than friends?

"Well, it's just odd." Artie mumbles. Inward I have to nod to the fact if Kurt and I date it will be odd. He would be missing out on what normal gay relationships are like.

"I think they look cute together!" B giggles jumping in her seat a bit. Kurt giggles back, smiling at her. I cannot help and smile back at him. But once he looks at me, I turn away. Ugh, what is wrong with me? I'm fucking hot, sexy, a stud; why am I freaking out on Kurt liking me? "Kurt, you should kiss Santana! She taught me everything about kissing!"

Oh my God, Brit...

_TBC?_

_

* * *

_A/N: Torture writing date scenes so I stopped and you can guess the rest~ Maybe I'll write a little more to it, but as of right now I have no ideas cause… I have no human interaction OTL lol Btw for you peeps who want to know the "star" in the "movie" Kurt watched his name is Buck Angel. If you ever watched 5 awesome gays (which sucks imo), one of the guys mentioned him being weird mainly for the fact Buck is a very butch man with a vagina.

_Teaser: Make-out scene and how proper Christian dating should be like courtesy of Mrs. Lopez._


	6. Chapter 6

**.o0o. Travis POV .o0o.**

The double date ran smoothly like an Earthquake in the middle of a heavy populated city. I tried to get Brit away from the topic that Kurt and I should date, but almost everything Kurt or I did made her make a side comment.

Me drinking some of my water caused my friend to say, "Oh, Santana swallows! So that's great for you, Kurt!" which result in Artie, Kurt, and I to spit out whatever we had in our mouths...

Kurt licking his lips from the salad dressing he had for dinner caused Britney to smile and say, "Oh look Santana! He knows how to lick lips!"

I swear that girl is way more perverted than Puck and I combine! That's just scary! Artie must be wondering why Kurt, an openly gay guy, is getting hints from Britney to go for me, a closeted Transguy. If I was Artie, which I really wouldn't mind to be him, I would wonder what is going on with this odd couple before me, one gay boy on a double date with lesbian looking girl, who is angry at the world and spend most of her time making fun of said gay boy.

Fuck! I hate myself! This is stupid! I should have never asked Kurt to come with me! Who was I kidding asking such a great guy to come out with someone like me? This is stupid, I am stupid! I should just stop whatever relationship I have with him before one of us gets hurt. Kurt needs to have a normal relationship with a cisgender male, not a freak like me. Why couldn't I-

"Santana?" Kurt's voice pulls me from my little rant. I look up at him, pushing the loose strands of hair away from my face. "I was wondering if you want to come over my house for a bit." He smiles so innocently.

I should say no. I should tell him this is not gonna work out since I am driving myself insane when I am near him. That all I want to do I hurt myself cause I can never be the man he deserves to be with. That once we get older and he meets other gay guys, he's going to break my heart to leave me for a complete guy and I'll be all alone. So, going to his house will cause to many chain of events that might happen. So no, I can't go to his home. "Sure." My heart leaps as I let the wrong, irrational word leave my mouth.

I look over at the couple on the other side of the table. Britney so obvious to the world, while Artie gives us a questioning look at neither of us wants to answer.

After dinner, I tell Britney I am gonna hang with Kurt for a bit before I go to her house to sleep over. She giggles, and then hugs me, as she tells me to "Get some". As horny as I have been these last few weeks there is no way I can "get some" in this state of mind and body anymore. But, to appear normal, I smile and tell her that's the plan. Artie and Britney gets picked up by her mother, which I also tell her I will be going to Kurt's for awhile. She sees nothing wrong with a girl going with a gay guy as she tells me to have fun. Kurt leads me to his car, opening the door for me like a gentleman but hurting me as he treats me more and more like a girl tonight. He hasn't even messed up calling me Travis or using male pronouns while in front of Artie. I should just back up. Stop flirting with him and try to act straighter so he can back off me.

"So, what's gonna happen for school?" Kurt tries to start some small talk over Lady Gaga sings from his iPod.

"I have ISS for a week. Every day I will meet with Miss. P for an hour. My parents won't be informed, also." I try to make myself sound more like a guy, slouching in my seat as I feel that the ace band aids are not working as well as they should be.

"Well, that's great." He nods, tapping on his steering wheel. "You'll be able to get the reduction still then."

"Pretty much." I make a pop sound on the P. "Hopefully I don't mess up again." I sigh, trying to relax as we get closer to his home. I only was there once before when he invited all the glee members there. We weren't friends and I wasn't going to go at first, but B went and I wanted to make her happy so I went.

When we got to Kurt's home, I tense a bit as we walk to the door as I remember Finn lives here too. What if he tells people I'm dressed like a guy? What if he hears Kurt call me Travis? What if Finn spreads that I'm a tranny? What if my mother finds out? What if-

Kurt opens the door, holding it open as I come in. Smiling, I try to calm myself from all the negative thoughts as I pull on my beanie. A man calls out for Finn, but Kurt confirms we are not his step-brother. The man walks into the room, saying he is shock to see him home so early as he thought the date would be a bit longer but Mr. Hummel stops short as his eyes rest on me. I smile nervously at him, trying to send out a vibe I'm a guy just incase Kurt's dad has gaydar from having a gay son.

"This is Santana." Kurt rests his hand on my shoulder, as I cannot help but tense at my name. The familiar feeling of depression rolls over me knowing Kurt does see me as female. "San, this is my father Burt Hummel."

"Pleasure to meet you, Mr. Hummel." I try to hold back my pain as I give him a full on smile. I am great at meeting parents; every one of them loves me since I am nice to them.

Kurt's dad sizes me up, trying to analyze if I am good enough for his son as he probably sees the people before him as his cute, gay son and his dyke, lesbian female friend. "You can call me Burt." He smiles, offering his hand for a shake as I return it trying to succeed as male but failing fast. He sees me as no threat of taking his son's virginity.

"We're just gonna be in my room." Kurt says, pulling me into the direction of his room as he opens the door his father tells us to have fun. Kurt chuckles; muttering mostly to just as that he intends to.

Oh man. If I do get to have some sweet virgin ass, I will die a happy man. Wait a minute, Finn was a virgin and I am- I laugh as we reach the bottom of the stairs. Kurt gives me a funny look as I still laugh at the irony oh what I just found out and must share with Kurt. Settling down on the soft bed, I catch my breath to tell Kurt of my discovery. "Finn's first time was with a guy!" I giggle, rolling onto my side. "Oh man! At the time he was so freaked out about gays, he pretty much had gay sex in my mind!"

"Aww! Gross!" Kurt laughs, "I do not need the image of my brother having sex!" Hm, sure. Kurt just doesn't want to think about straight sex. "Anyways, want to play some video games before Finn comes back?"

"I never thought of you as a geek." I tease as Kurt passes me a black remote while he holds the pink one for himself.

"Blowing stuff up is a great way to relief stress." Kurt laughs, shoving me softly as he puts the game on.

"Oh, I know that blowing helps a lot." I grin out, seeing Kurt flush at my comment.

**.o0o.**

"You little cheat!" I shout, trying to slap the pink remote out of his hand so he can die with me by the millions of zombies whom leave me to die as they follow Kurt's character.

"Hey!" He shouts, pushing his body against mine to make me not attack him. "I'll bring you back! Don't kill me!"

"Kurt!" I whine, looking back to the bottom of the screen and shooting at the few zombies crawling over my body.

"Travis!" He mocks, as he pauses the game. "I told you to stay near me."

"There were shit tons of zombies! How the fuck can I stay near you!"

"I have the Zeus Cannon!"

"I dunno even know what that fucking means!"

"Ohmigawd!"

"Oh my God, yourself!" I shove him, playfully though. He does be same but with a little more force, giggling as I fall back on the comfy bed. I pull him with me though, ready to pin him to the bed but he locks himself on top of me by sitting on my pelvic and pinning my hands over my head. "See, you're a cheat." I pout, licking my lips. A serious look pulls onto Kurt's face as he leans down, his forehead resting on my own.

"Travis." He whispers as our breath mingles, I make a soft sound scared if I talk he will not want to do whatever he is going to do since my voice is too female.

He closes the last inch for our lips to softly touch that it seems like a dream. His lips are just as soft as I dream about, better than any guy I had kissed and sweeter than Britney's. He pulls away slightly, as if to see it was okay for him to go on. I nod, closing my eyes as I smile into the second kiss. Straight away his tongue seeks to enter my mouth as I shyly let him enter. I moan deeply as Kurt's oddly skill tongue teases my own into playing with him. I pull him closer as his taller body covers my own on his rather comfy bed. Running my hands through his soft brown hair, I plunge my tongue into attack mode to take control of the kiss but to only get into a heated match. Kurt's hand moves down my back, under my shirt to only feel the ace bandaids I wrapped tightly to bind. This must have made him realize that he is making out with a biological female as he pulls back breathing hard.

I let my head fall onto his pillow, which is just as soft as his bed, trying to catch my breath as Kurt does the same. He doesn't remove his hand from under my shirt nor does he moves off of me. He places soft kisses over my throat as my breath gets caught in my chest. He must not care about my body if he is not having a straight freak out, that or he accepts the fact transguys are just like every other guy minus an attach penis... And plus the boobs...

Pushing myself up, I meet Kurt's gentle lips once more as he sits on my lap. "You really know how to make-out." I tell him, placing butterfly kisses on his jaw.

"Britney taught me how, plus tons of watching others make-out helps." He laughs, moving off of me next to me. His hand moves to my face as he touches my beanie. "I must be a natural."

"Psh, as if." I lean close to him, "This might sound corny but I really like you." I whisper, scared that he won't return my feelings even though we just had the hottest make-out session. Plus he is the first boy I ever kissed that made me feel like a real guy.

"I like you too, as corny as it sounds." He whispers just as gently, closing the distance between our lips.

A crash makes us jump away from each other; I turn to see a really confused Finn.

Fuck my life.

"What is Santana doing here?" The freakishly tall boy squeaks, not bothering to pick up his bowl of chips as he points at me.

"Nothing!" I freak out. "Nothing happen!" I look over to Kurt who I want to back me put but us looks hurt. Fuck fuckity fuck! "I mean..." I panic, I don't want Kurt to be hurt but I cannot come out! "If you tell anyone, Finn, I swear I will make your life horrible!"

"That you were kissing my gay brother!"

"What? No!" I shout, looking at Kurt who is now confused but relief it is not about us kissing. "That I am dress like this!"

"That you look like a boy!"

"Yes, stupid!" I groan out, tensing up in fear that he would blab it out and somehow it will get to my mother. I feel Kurt place his hand on my leg, rubbing it to smooth my nerves which it does just that. I look over at him and smile, as that earns a smile right back.

"So... You're straight now?" Frankenteen ask to his brother in pure shock. "I thought you understood that I am fine with you being gay?"

"Finn, this has nothing to do with being straight or gay." Kurt sighs, moving away from me to stand before his step-bro. "Please don't freak out, in fact this is a normal event."

"NORMAL?" Finn does freak out, glaring at me though. I glare back at him making Finn frown. "Why her though." His anger pushes back though. "She is the LAST girl anyone should go to!"

"Oh, man the fuck up, Hudson." I roll my eyes, taking a stand into my full height even though I am the shortest guy in the room.

"You ruined my relationship!" He points at me, "I know you're just trying to do the same thing to Kurt so he can't have a normal relationship."

That hits right at home. My eyes widen as he states the thing I have been repeating to myself for weeks. If others can see it, then it is true. Kurt and I can't be together. The idea that i have been dreading for a long time has come true. Feeling frustrated, I push pass the giant to run up the stairs. Fuck, I'm so stupid.

"Travis, stop!" I hear Kurt call out for me using my male name before Finn who is gonna tell everyone. "Please!" I hear the door to his room shut as I get to the front door, ready to get the hell out of this place. The moment I get the door open, Kurt closes it and turns me around to DVD him. "Just wait a-"

"I'm sorry." I tell him, breaking down. "This is stupid, I'm sorry." I apologize, running my hands over my face.

"You don't have to be sorry." He whispers, leaning close. "I don't care, I just know the happy feelings I get when I am with you and I don't want them to go away."

"I can't though." I feel tears fill up my eyes, I take a few deep breaths hoping to get my shit together. "You deserve-"

Kurt closes the gap, kissing me with passion that even that mini-make-out session didn't have. I shouldn't be kissing him back, but I still do since he makes me feel like I am truly a guy. Maybe it's cause I know he is gay, and as a girl I would never have a chance, so knowing this I feel more like a guy.

"What's going on here?" Burt interrupts us, Kurt groans something I couldn't understand as he holds onto my hands. "Kurt, why are you kissing a girl?"

"I told you!" Finn runs to us, I can't help but groan knowing he actually told on us like a little kid.

"Finn, this has nothing to do with you!" Kurt snaps at him, I pull my hand out of his hands though.

"You didn't answer me." Burt frowns at me, like I am something evil that is changing his son into something he doesn't know.

"Dad, you have nothing to worry about."

"I should go." I mutter, turning to leave but only being stopped by Kurt again.

"Travis, don't go." He says, I wince that Finn gives me a disgust look though.

"Why are you calling her Travis?"

"Finn, just shut up!"

"Kurt, don't talk to him-"

I take that as my cue to get the hell out of there, opening the door I run as fast as my cheerleading legs can take me, which is really far thanks to Coach. I can hear Kurt calling out for me, Finn still confused, and Mr. Hummel asking what the hell is going on.

**.o0o. Kurt POV .o0o.**

Locking myself in the bathroom, I keep calling Travis feeling like I somehow messed up even though it is Finn's fault! Why couldn't he just mind his own business? If anything, he should be happy I am with a girl! I mean, Travis is not a girl... I mean, fuck whatever! This is confusing!

"Please pick up." I mutter, glaring at the bathroom who has Finn banging on the door with his mother asking what is wrong and my dad saying I was making out with a girl.

"I can't pick up-"

I just hang up, groaning I leave him a text message that I'm sorry Finn found out. Cursing, I stomp my feet like a child and call Blaine.

"Hey! How was the date?" Blaine cheerfully answers. "What's with the banging?"

I scream at Finn to stop, which he does. "Great. Till I brought him home, had a make out session with my brother walking right into it."

"Ouch... It was a heavy make out? Kurt, I know having a boyfriend means sex but honestly on the first-"

"Travis had sex with Finn, which made Finn and Rachel broke up." I cut him off from whatever story he was gonna tell.

"Oh. Well, damn. I guess that didn't go well."

"Travis was freaking out and upset. I'm scared he might hurt himself." my heart pounds fast as the thought of Travis cutting himself and probably bleeding to death. "It's not fair." I tear up, "We just told each other our feelings and this shit happens. Why can't I just be normal? If I was straight-"

"Travis wouldn't be into you, he would have never open up to you, and for all we know he might have killed himself." Blaine reasons to me, making me feel bad about hating myself. "Imagine all the things he has told you, without you it will bottle up and instead of him getting into a fight with a girl he could have attacked someone stronger to killed himself from the stress."

"I... I just want us to be happy. I want him to be happy."

"What you should do is explain to your family. I know Travis might not want that, but it's best to explain so things will be less confusing."

He's right. I tell him that, also. I need to explain that Santana is Travis so Finn can understand and not do more damage to Trav. Sighing, I bid good bye to Blaine as he wishes me luck. I send a quick text telling Travis I am gonna explain everything to my family and make sure Finn understands how fragile this is so he doesn't tell people at school. I went a few moments, hoping to get an answer but he doesn't text back. Frowning, I check my appearance and get ready to face my family for the sake of my future boyfriend. I hope Travis still wants to be my boyfriend...

Opening the door, I notice they are not waiting for me which relieves me for a few moment to catch my breath I did not know I as holding. Walking proud I make my way to the kitchen, seeing everyone sitting there talking among themselves. My dad is the first to notice as he frowns and stands up to ask me a question but I raise my hand to stop him, which he does.

"I have something really important to share with all of you." I sigh, "And while it is not my place to say this, nor do I fully understand it myself, I cannot have Finn do more harm than he already has done."

"I didn't do anything!" He pouts, whining as he glares at me a bit. I roll my eyes at his behavior.

"Let me explain this the best that I can, then you can ask me questions. Okay?" I look at everyone seeing them nod. "Okay, now this might be confusing but Santana is Travis. He's a transsexual." Finn makes an odd face as if something gross just happen before him, which I cannot believe he did that! "He doesn't want people to know that he is trans, since his mother is against gays and transgender people, and he is scared how others will react knowing he is one. I understand how he feels a bit, I may not see myself as the wrong gender but it's scary to be different and hated for something you are born with or can't change."

"So, this girl is a boy?" My dad mumbles, totally confused. "So... She, I mean, he has a girl body?"

"Yes."

"And you kissed a girl?" Carol enters the discussion, asking in an innocent confusion and not full of disgust that Finn says it like.

"Which makes no sense cause you're gay!" Finn shouts, standing up. His mother slaps his arm and tells him to sit down.

"I am still gay, Finn." I glare at him. "Santana sees himself as a guy, so I do too. Plus the few weeks I have been hanging out with him, he is like every other guy out there."

"But in a girl's body!" He says full of distaste.

"Honestly, this has nothing to do with you!" I shout at my step-brother. "So what if Travis and I are together?"

"Her name is Santana!" He shouts, glaring down at me.

"I cannot believe you!" I shout at him, holding myself back to not punch him. "You can try to understand what is going on like my dad and your mom!"

"It's kind of hard when she sleeps with like everyone in the school!"

"Oh, you're just angry that you slept with him!"

"What! No!"

"You slept with who?" Carol joins in, yelling at her son though.

I took this moment to get out of there before I lose my cool.

**.o0o.**

I keep trying to reach Travis another way, since he was supposed to go over to Britney's house, I called his blonde best friend.

"Hello, Kurtie!" Brit giggles, I can imagine her jumping on her bed as she answer the call.

"Is Travis there?"

"Um..." I hear a hush voice in the background talking to Britney fast. "Travie is not here...?"

Meaning he was.

I don't understand why he doesn't want to talk to me! We just kissed and confessed our mutual attraction to each other. I frown, wondering if he really doesn't like me. It wouldn't make sense though, I know that he wouldn't waste his time with someone he doesn't like, Travis said it all the time in glee. "Can you tell him I had to explain his situation to Finn and if Finn tells anyone Travis can punch him."

"Okie dokie!"

"And also tell Travis to read his text messages even if he doesn't want to text me back..." I sigh, not knowing what else to do. "Thanks, Brit, see you some other time."

"Bye bye!"

**.o0o.**

The next day Travis still didn't answer my text, which worried me to no end as I text Britney to see if he was okay. She replies that he went home before she can see him adding a few sad faces.

Before I left to drive to Dalton, I threaten Finn not to tell anyone about Travis being trans and tried to hold myself back from slapping him as Finn made a face as I called Santana Travis. Honestly, this has nothing to do with him anymore why is he being such a jerk. My father catches me while I warm up the car to give me some prep talk that he was just a bit shock I was kissing a girl, which I remind him Travis isn't a girl, and he just needs time to get use to the idea of me dating a transsexual but will do his best and make sure Finn doesn't tell everyone for Travis' sake. I hugged him thanking him since I know it's what Travis would want.

Knowing that Travis is awake for church, I wish him luck on his day and start my hour drive back to school; wishing that I was still at McKindly to help him through the school hours and to have more time with him. Every red light I checked to see if he text back, frowning to see he hasn't though. This is all Finn's fault! He ruins all my relationships! Okay, so Finn and I probably wouldn't have worked out, but Sam and I might have! Or that one time Puck was drunk and hitting on me, I could have totally got with him but nope, Finn pushed Puck to someone else. Now it's Travis and I! No, I will make sure we get to date! I can't be alone forever thanks to Finn's stupidity!

Hearing my cell text ring go off, I jump at the feeling of it vibrate and try to read it in hope that it is Travis answering finally! Sadly, it's just Blaine telling me to text him when I get on campus. He probably has exciting news on some guy finally falling for his charms at school, no doubt in my opinion.

Once at school, I tell Blaine I just got here as I make my way through the grand entrance to just run into my friend.

"You know a girl name Santana?" He starts without saying hello.

"Yes?" I blink, wondering why he even know who Santana is and hoping somehow word did not get to him about Santana being Travis. "Why?"

"She send me a message on Facebook telling me that I should try and date you, which I respond that we are just friends and you like Travis, but she was dead set on us dating. I was wondering why cause it was just plaining odd, she even said Travis and you shouldn't date because it's weird. I thought you said Travis is not out?"

"He isn't... Travis and Santana are... The same person." I blink, really confused as to why he gave Blaine a message but doesn't bother texting me back, or even trying to set Blaine and I together when we confessed to each other! Shaking my head, I move to my dorm.

"Now this is getting odder every moment." Blaine hums, following me closely. "What else happen that would cause Travis to have a freak out?" I tell him everything, hoping he can somehow help me figure what to do but not getting my hopes up since I don't think Blaine has ever dated a transsexual nor have friends whom had these experiences... "Oh." He frowns, sitting on my bed as I unpack some clothing. "I see why he will be freaking out a bit, not the best way to be shoved out of the closet and to have someone to call him abnormal for wanting to be with you. Travis probably been having that stuck in his head hat he shouldn't date you because he's trans."

"I don't know how to handle this." I groan, falling onto my bed with a pout. "I don't want us to not be together without trying, I know he likes me! Before he came out, he would always be mean to people he didn't like so he must have something real with me, I just know it."

"I think you should give him some time to think." Blaine frowns, "I know you want to make sure he's fine but it probably pains him more to have you talk to him as of right now." I try to hold back my pout as sit up. "I'll message San- erm, Travis back and try to ease his mind."

"Fine." I let out the pout, mumbling the rest of "It's not fair he's talking to you."

Blaine pats my chest telling me to cheer up and that I might as well go online shopping for my soon-to-be-boyfriend. I wonder what Travis would like as a gift, might as well play it cool and get something I know his mother wouldn't buy him and every guy should have.

_TBC?_

_

* * *

_

A/N: This is soooo long LOL I actually cut out one part at the end to place it in the next chapter…

First thing, I wrote the kiss scene out of boredom and decided to place it in this chapter cause it's like chapter 6 and they haven't kissed or finally confess their feelings after chapters of them moaning and bitching about it. So, that's for you loyal readers who reviews

Next, Santana/Travis dysphoria kicks in over drive and after Finn getting in on her/his personal life she/he is freaking out even more.

Finally, I'm trying to keep Blaine as Kurt's mentor but I have no idea if Blaine is doing a good job when it comes to transsexual so... tell me if he is doing an okay job in your opinion!

_PS: the super bowl episode was like OMFG AMAZING! From this I have an idea what I want future!Travis to become cause honestly High School kids at my school were not able to do great stag make-up as the glee kids. Too bad Santana got kicked off Cheerios so no male cheerleading uniform. It wasn't gonna be a big part of her life after the plot changes I thought of after last night…_

_PSS: Since the story moves into their adulthood, should I keep it part of this one or make a new story for it? _

THANKS FOR THE REVIEWS LAST CHAPTER, HOPING TO SEE MORE!


	7. Chapter 7

**.o0o. Travis POV .o0o.**

I should just man up and tell Kurt thanks or something meaningful instead of being such a pussy. But Finn is right, Kurt should just be in a normal relationship at least for his first boyfriend should be a real boy and not some tranny. I even try to set him up with that cute singer from his school, Blaine, but the guy just keep on saying how Kurt is madly in love with Travis. Ugh, making my life harder than it is. What an asshole.

My mother yells at me to get moving for church even though I am already ready just waiting for her to get her ass into motion. Sighing, I just sign out of Facebook and fix my skirt as I walk downstairs to watch TV as I wait for my mum. Maybe I should text Kurt, no doubt Blaine told Kurt that I send him message to go for him instead of me. Or maybe it will make Kurt see that I don't want him to date me, even though I do. It's better to have my heart broken now before I get sucked in too deep or have something bad happen to either of us. I know my mother is going to hear about me dressing like a boy, and something bad is going to happen all because Finn is a dick.

Or maybe I can try and get on my mother's good side so even if it slips to her she will love me enough to believe me! Well, not love me... But I have a feeling it might work a bit. What girls like talking about is dating, so if normal mother and daughters can bond through that maybe we can too!

Though, it's only gonna work if she gets her ass into gear to get to church on time so she doesn't bitch about it all day and make me want to slit my throat.

Sighing as I know what to do, I get up to hurry my mum into a faster pace so she can be in a good mode so I can get my plan into gear.

"Mom, we are going to be late!" I yell from the bottom of the stairs, glancing at my reflection and frowning at my girlish appearance. I pull my hair out of the bun and trying to hide it a bit with my long hair. Eh, whatever if I end up looking like an emo freak. "Mom!"

"I am coming!" She slams the door as I see her coming down the stairs looking more like a lesbian than I do in men clothing... No words can describe what I am feeling. Unfair she can look like a dyke but I cannot wear boy clothing without her slashing into me.

Once in the car and moving, I try to think of how to go about this mother and daughter bonding time. Holding back a sigh, I start off with. "Mom, can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"There's this guy I like, but I don't know what to do."

And here we go.

"It's not Puckerman's child, right?" Her voice is full of hate as she grips the wheel harder.

"Ew no. We are just friends in Glee." I half lie, mainly if she knew if we are friends she will kill me. "He actually transfer out of McKinley to Dalton, but he visits the Glee club when he comes back home for the weekends."

"Oh, Dalton is a great school for boys." She nods, "Private schools are great learning environments for teenagers. I wanted to send you to one but your father said no."

"Well... Yeah this guy goes there and I really like him."

"Is he Christian?"

"Um, I think so...?" I lie.

"What do you mean you think so?"

"Well, I just don't ask him if he is one."

"You should."

"…Okay., I will?" What the fuck…

"You shouldn't date someone who isn't Christian; you never know what weird things they are into then." She continues, "There are too many sinful people in this world and it is best to follow those who love God."

Yeah… This isn't gonna work out, abort the fucking plan. "Okay, I'll see if he is. If not, I'll just not date him."

"Nor you should be his friend. People like that aren't worth your time."

"Yes, mom." Sweet mother of God, I am gonna punch myself in the face if I talk to her any longer."Wait, we aren't going to the church we usually go to?" I frown, looking through the windows as she drives to someplace else. My heart begins to pound fast as I fear that she has found the ace band aids, my boy clothing, and worst looked through my history on my laptop.

"I found a better one." She says in a sickening cheerful voice, "That church was dull and didn't give the right message." I try not to roll my eyes as I watch the scenery rush by. "This one is very lively."

Ugh, all churches suck, teaching about how much they hate homosexuals and transsexuals, making people like me hate themselves for being alive while they cheer for our death. I tell myself it's only every Sunday till I move out, but it doesn't seem like it is as I sit in the church for more than an hour a day learning why I will never be loved by my family. Groaning, as she pulls into a parking spot in front of the white old looking church, I walk next to my mother as we walk into the church only to gasp at how awkward I am going to feel. Not to sound like a racist but being the lightest skinned person makes me feel odd. My eyes widen at whom I make contact with when she is singing as her eyes widen at me too.

Fuck, what the hell is Mercedes doing here?

Making sure my cell is still off, I slouch in my chair ready for three hours to pass by me as I sing in my head every Disney song by memory, even a few Lady Gaga ones but they made me feel bad as to me chickening out on Kurt. Damn, I should call him or text me back. Just tell it as it is that Kurt needs a real boy for a boyfriend and that Blaine guy is pretty hot. No, noooo! What the hell! I am Travis Fucking Lopez, I deserve to have a boyfriend who actually sees me as a man and will treat me like one, and who will probably let me top his ass! Okay, time to grow up Travie. We will call Kurt after church and just be like:

"Oh, sorry babe, I had a gay freak out. But no worries, I'm only hard for you."

Wait, no that sounds lame.

What about:

"Kurt, I fucking love that you make me feel like your man and only time I think you should have fantasies about Blaine is if it's a threesome."

Ummm... Nah, not really romantic is it? Hm, what did Britney like? Actually scratch that thought, I never did anything romantic with her one of the reasons why we shouldn't have lasted other than me freaking out on her. What is romance? A dinner in the park by moonlight? Signing my undying love to Kurt as we row a boat into a lake? Oh! Getting glee club to help do a song for Kurt in a public area! Now that's hot. Oh, wait. We can't do that... I sound like a fucking girl and I kind of don't want them to know I'm trans since if they are like Finn, they will be freaking out. Just because they support gays doesn't mean they have to support transsexuals. Maybe I can get Britney to help sing the song? Eh, I'll work out the romance stuff later.

Maybe I should come out to someone else. Who is close to me enough, who I trust, and I know I can kill them in their sleep if they end up saying transphobic things? Hm. Oh, Puck probably. It'll get him to back off of wanting to sleep with me also. I'll have to see what Kurt thinks, if he still wants to talk to me... Maybe if I get into Mercedes good side she'll put a good word for me for Kurt and then Kurt can be honest with her on us dating, cause if I know that Diva she is gone be pissed if Kurt and I are boyfriends and we didn't tell her.

Glancing around, I see Mercedes siting in the front listen full on what the pastor is preaching. I slouch more getting very uncomfortable with my body. I wonder if Mercedes will be okay win the whole transsexual thing, maybe she'll cheer Kurt and I on too? Getting ahead of myself, am I?

My mom slaps my arm, gaining my attention to get me to stand with her as the whole church does the last prayer.

Thank you, God, for making this end and helping give time to think about what to do in my sad life. Amen.

As everyone disperses to talk to their friends, I move over to Mercedes as she talks to some older lady. Calming myself down, I put on my fake confidence and stand tall as I come f e to face to the diva. "Hey, Mercedes." I smile, waving a bit to gain friendly attention. "Fancy spotting you here."

She rolls her eyes, placing a hand on her hips, with one eyebrow up. "Yeah, well, what are you doing here?"

"My mom makes me go to church, I know what a shocker! Santana is in a church and not burning, awesome." I roll my own eyes, copying her stance with more of a bitch vibe rolling off me. "Anyways, I thought it will be awesome if we just let go of the past and become friends." I grin out, "Plus I need your help with something."

"Being friends only means you need something from me."

"True, true, but I am changing for the better and well lets just say I need to get on your good side no matter what." I look around the small church, "Mind if I came over to chat a bit?"

"Um, sure. I was supposed to webcam with Kurt after this but I'll just call text him."

"Nah, I have to call him anyways so I'll tell him." I shrug, the diva gives me a look as if she wants to know why I am calling him but I brush her off by saying, "Lemme ask my mother if I can go, most likely it is a yes but you never know with her, and I'll be outside waiting for you." I give the best friendly smile I can muster and wiggle my fingers as I stroll off to my mother.

My mom does say yes, clearly happy I am making friends in the church and does not want to come between that like she does with my social life outside of the church. I tell her thanks with a quick lie of I love you and rush outside to call Kurt.

It only rings once when a panicking Kurt picks up with a quick, "Hello."

"Hey, Kurt... Um... I got your text."

"But you didn't text me back?" He sighs, I can hear the disappointment roll off of him. "Are you okay? I know Finn's knowledge of this is stressing you but you did not need to tell Blaine to try and be my boyfriend!"

"I'm sorry! I had like a gay freak out." I say quickly as I walk away from the churn to have a bit more private conversation. "I just want you to have a normal gay life."

"Normal is boring, plus we make a cute couple." He giggles.

My heart stops in excitement. "So you still want to be with me, even though I freaked out?"

"Of course! Just promise me that you will just talk to me about your problems instead of shutting away."

"Promise." I grin, "Oh, I want to tell Mercedes that I'm trans. So you can talk to her about us and not keep secrets from your best friend."

"Are you sure? You don't have to come out if you don't want to."

"I'm sure. Mercedes is a great friend for you, plus I need someone to hear it from me instead of Finn's big mouth."

"Okay. Just call me if you need help, though I am suppose to webcam with her soon."

"No prob." Looking up I see Mercedes walking over to me with her family in tow, "I'll talk to you later. Bye, babe." I can imagine Kurt flushing at the little nickname as he whispers a good bye. Hells yeah, I am an awesome boyfriend!

I rush over to Kurt's friend as she gives me an odd look, probably wondering why I am smiling a lot, but I just keep on grinning happy to know Kurt doesn't mind us not being a normal gay couple. Oh my, we are a couple! Yes! My first boyfriend whom sees me as a boy! I control the need to pump my fist in the air, jumping like a mad man, and screaming yes. That will be odd to do when Mercedes family is talking to me.

"Oh, you're that girl who help our Mercedes on the duet." Her mother smiles at me, as we shake hands. "You sound so lovely, you should have won." Not even my own mother would tell me I sound lovely...

I shrug, "It's cool. It's hard to win against Barbie and Ken."

"She means Quinn and Sam." Mercedes sighs, "Finn and Rachel totally rigged that."

"Probably. I wouldn't be surprise, Finn is a sneaky guy if he wants too." I shrug. Plus Frankteen is a little bitch, I am gonna get my revenge. No one messes with Travis Lopez and gets away with it for long.

**.o0o.**

Sitting on Mercedes bed with a nice tall cup of water, thanks to Mercedes father, said girl gives me a look at start talking. Frowning, I take a long slow sip of water knowing once I tell her she will either hate me or think I'm joking. Or in high hopes of this small town she will accept me as trans. Sighing; I place the cup down as I stand to full height. "Okay, so you know how I am always a bitch to people?"

"Who hasn't notice?" Her eyebrow shots up in a taunt.

Oh sweet God give me strength not to punch her. "Yeah, well, reason why I am always in a bad mood is because I'm not really open with myself, nor confidant with myself, so I have a need to push others away and down." I stop, thinking over if I should add more, but Mercedes tells me to go on with interest. "Reason why I am going to tell you this is because I trust you enough to understand since you are friends with Kurt. And if he trust you, I do too."

"Okay..."

"I'm a transsexual." I wince, waiting for her to lash out and freak out on me like Finn saw Kurt and I make out.

"Wait what?" She frowns. I sit down on her pink sheets with a sigh. "You were a boy?"

"Oh God no." I groan, "I'm a female to male."

"Oh." I stare at her bitting my lips as she tries to think of something to say. Please say something! I can't take this! "So, you're a boy?"

I smile, "Yes!" I jump up, "I'm a guy, which I do go by Travis."

"Who knows?"

"Britney, Kurt, and I think Finn so far."

"Is that why Kurt has been hanging with Britney and you a lot?"

"At first, yes but now..." I pause, wondering if I should tell her but I shrug it off that it might be better for me to explain. "Kurt and I are now a couple. And before you blow up wondering why he hasn't told you, it just happen last night and I kind of freaked out since Finn freaked out on Kurt and I making out." I add quickly.

"Whoa! What?" I open my mouth to say it again but she raises her hand to silence me. "Cute that you guys are together but why did Finn freak out?"

"He kind of doesn't like the idea I am trans... And with Kurt as I quote." I make quotation marks with my fingers, "Can't have a normal relationship. End quote." I make the same gesture.

"Oh, Imma cut that boy! No one messes with Kurt!" Mercedes growls out, but then looks back at me with the same look, "Which reminds me, if you mess with Kurt Imma cut you too." But then she smiles out, "So, tell me! How romantic was your date?"

"Umm... I suck at romance..." I frown. "Wait, so you're okay with me being trans?"

"Yeah, if it makes you happy than go for it." She smiles, "Nothing wrong about being trans, though just give me time to call you Travis and use male pronouns."

"Thanks for understanding." I smile, feeling emotions pull at my chest as I try not to cry. "Just... Um, I need to tell the others at glee but if you see that they kind of don't like the idea of me being-"

"No sweat, I'll put them in their place."

I know this is gonna be a start of a beautiful friendship.

**.o0o. Kurt POV .o0o.**

Typing away on my laptop, I get a message from Mercedes asking to webcam. Checking that my hair is okay, I click confirm as I get settle in my bed to talk to my bestie. "Hey girl." I smile, seeing Mercedes face with great make up. "I love what you did, very Gaga."

"Thanks, San... I mean, Travis did it for me." She giggles, doing some poses to show of what he had done to her. "He's really good!"

"Did he leave?" I frown a bit, kind of hoping to see him.

"No!" I hear him in the background.

"He's taking off some of the makeup he wore to church." My friend shrugs and then smiles, "Plus he's doing something special for you."

"Oh really?" I grin out, leaning closer to the screen. "And what would that be."

"You'll find out in a sec, jeeze babe." I hear him laugh in the background.

"Oh yeah! You guys are gonna be the cutest couple in our group!"

"We totally beat Barbie and Ken." I hear Travis laugh, "Mercedes is our number one fan!"

"Well, if you dress like this around Kurt when dating no duh you guys are adorable."

"Ugh, hurry Travis! I wanna see!" I pout dramatically earning a laugh from Cedes.

"Alright, alright!" I hear he huff and he walks on screen. "I'm just borrowing one of Mercedes' brother's sweater, which I am amazed I fit into kids clothing, anyways cause my binding skills are lacking with no ace bandaids..." Travis does a spin, and then leans to the webcam. "Like? I never done drag king make up before, but I have been watching tons of videos on how to do it." He bits his chap lips and my breath gets stuck in my chest, "It would be better if I had facial hair but-"

"You look amazing." I whisper out, knowing that Travis heard as he smiles warmly and Mercedes in the background making squeals. "I never was one for facial hair, but your five o'clock shadow is really well done."

"I was going for rough look." He grins, "Glad you like cause this is only one part of what I am gonna show you." He pulls his hair into a messy bun, leaving some strands on his face giving him a look as if he had a hard day at work. He smirks as his eyes looks down as I hear him click away in the pc. "Here's the rest of what I wanted to show you, all thanks to Mercedes giving me such an idea."

"I do watch a lot of RuPaul." She giggles, sitting on her bed as Travis angles the computer to show off the open space in my friend's room.

"Okay, lets do this!" he clicks something as he rushes to stand in the middle of her room with his eyes close. A soft melody starts as he begins to lip-sing with the real singer, giving the illusion that Travis does have a male's singing voice.

**.o0o.**

I clap at the end of the song, unable to stop giggling as Travis ends the song. "That was awesome!"

"Omigawd, you need to do this for glee!" Mercedes jumps off her bed to hug Travis, whom is still out of breath from dancing. "Do full on drag, well... Make up and show it off!"

"Erm... I dunno..." He flushes, looking over to the computer and smiling at me. "I just want this to be for Kurt so he can imagine how I can probably sing once on T."

"T?" Cedes blinks confused, looking at Trav but hen me to explain.

"Testosterone." I answer, smiling at them. "You will sound so much better though."

"Most guys don't go on T if they are singers, at least from my understanding." Travis sighs, moving to sit in front of the pc as I get a better look of the masculine face he had made. Wow, he looks so hot as a guy! I am so lucky to have him! "I hope I don't lose mine, even though I don't want to be a singer but I have no idea what to do anyways... Just a safety net my voice will be."

"Kurt is gonna be famous so he'll take care of you." Cedes giggles, patting my boyfriends pat.

"You have my support to be anything you want, Trav." I tell him, "You can stay with me if anything bad happens to you. I'll be there."

"Thanks." He gives me a watery smile, "That's what I love about you, babe." I heat up at the nickname. This is so surreal having a boyfriend! I only dreamed about having one and having a cute pet name! Ah! So great! "Crap, I have to get ready to go home." He let's out a whine, "My mom is cooking dinner... Ugh, worst food ever."

"Maybe I can see if you can stay over then." Mercedes offers, I nod hoping so I can just talk to him more and that I don't really like his mother even though we never met.

"Nah, she'll bitch about it later." He got up, getting off screen. "I'll text you later tonight, Kurt."

"Okay." I answer him, then hear a door open and close. Mercedes sits before me with a look that only means she wants to know something. "What?"

"So, you and Travis." She hums, a smirk playing on her lips. "It's a bit weird cause well... Travis is Santana and she was kind of a bitch."

"He opened up to me a lot, it's been weeks from when he came out; and we pretty much text every day. He was scared of what happens if people found out and I can't blame him anymore due to the bullying." I frown, "If it wasn't for the bullies he might have not been scared to come out earlier and I wouldn't have to be at Dalton away from you all."

"Hey, things happen for a reason."

"Yeah, I know but I rather not have drama..." I frown, sighing as I lean closer to the webcam.

"No drama?" She laughs, "This is not the Kurt I know!"

I can't help but giggle at that. "Well, it's getting tiring after awhile." I sigh, wondering if everyone in New Directions is getting tired with all the drama we get for being different. Probably not since most of them are, or at least were, popular.

"Wow," I hear Travis come in sounding amazed by something. "Your hand wash smells amazing." He tells my friend, moving into the view all dressed up like a girl. "Like, is it mango? Cause I can now smell my hands all day cause of that." He sniffs his hands with a childish grin. "Oh man, I now have to go home…"

"Why?" I pout.

"I can't say it in front of a lady." He smirks, glancing at my friend whom has a knowing smile on her face as she nods.

_TBC_

_

* * *

_A/N: Sorry, I was gonna upload this for V-day but I didn't. Then I thought about writing some smutt for them but I didn't finish it on time... But whatever, I hate that day anyways. BTW MANY THANKS FOR THE REVIEWS! I DIED OF HAPPINESS! Keep this up and I will finish that porn for you :3 lol

_But omfg! SANTANA hnnng was sooo great to hear her voice! She has more lines now yay! But ew that Sam and her are now together… I'm hoping for Sam and Blaine to get it on but whatever…_


	8. Chapter 8

A/N: OMFG I AM SOOOOO SORRY! I caught the flu and then writer's block… I am so SOOO sorry. Plus this chapter sucks since I forgot what I wanted to write when I had the flu... I hope you guys can enjoy this, next chapter won't take forever but first I have to finish a chapter for **Dirty Little Secret** (_Shameless plugs lolol_) for the Kum fans. You guys can also go read **Illusion** which is about Santana not coming out as trans.

* * *

**.o0o. Travis POV .o0o.**

Taking out about thirty pieces of extensions, which were glued into my head, took a lot longer than I thought it would be. In fact during the time I called Mercedes to just ask her if I should just shower with the hair glue remover to make things go fast, she said no. Well she said I was crazy then told me no. But after awhile without the weave in, I was able to look at myself with somewhat shorter hair. I look hot with short hair. Well, I look hot all the time.

My mother didn't think so, though. In fact she yelled at me saying I'm a dyke for having short hair. She followed me to my room, demanding me to put the weave back on, but I try an sooth her into thinking going all natural is best. It sort of worked out. She did mutter calling me a dyke a few times more, but I didn't pay much attention since I don't like girls that much to be a lesbian and the fact I'm not a girl in spirit.

Fixing my hair to be all messy in a way like I just had hot gay sex, I took a picture to send it to my boyfriend, and telling him I'm going to get a haircut to get it styled better. Honestly, it feels really good to call Kurt my boyfriend. Smiling, I chuckle at Kurt's message that he loves my hair short and cannot wait to see it styled.

_I'm thinking of a Mohawk ;)_

_OMFG YOU BETTER NOT! _

_But it'll look sooooo awesome. I'll totally rock it better than Puck too, and be sexier._

_NOOOOOOOO! _

I went to tease him more but he calls me. Picking up the call, I giggle a bit. I mean, I give a manly chuckle. "Hey, babe."

"Don't you _babe_ me, you better not get a Mohawk." Kurt says sternly, I can practically hear him pouting also.

"Fine." I dramatically groan, "What should I get? I have to make sure it's pretty girly though... My mum will kill me. She flipped out when I took them out, so getting a hair cut will, well I don't want to think about it."

"I'm sorry." My boyfriend whispers, "I wish I can just take you way from there."

"You are such a creeper, babe." I try and light up the mood. He giggles at that. "I'll just Google some hair styles for guys and girls and hope for the best."

**.o0o.**

School was gonna be boring as fuck. In all honesty, I rather have OSS. Better to be home and bored than school and bored. Thank God my mom had work so I was able to leave the house without my Cheerio uniform, like hell I'll wear that when I don't have too.

Puck picked me up, since he had basketball practice, without Brit and Artie. He comments how sexy I look with short hair, I thank him cause he is totally right. Puck then started talking about the fat white bitch how he might be in live with her, he even said that we should do a double date cause what's her face likes those kinds of things. Um, fuck no. He states I should date Sam since Quinn might break it off soon. Sam is kind of cute, but Kurt and I are together. I wonder if Kurt would like to double date, probably not with Puck and fat whore though, maybe Artie and Brit again? Nah...

"I already have a boyfriend." I smirk, touching my hair to mess it up.

"No way, who?" Puck says with disbelief.

"Um..." Fuck, should I say it? Then I have to either lie how Kurt is straight now or tell the truth... Fuck me. In reality, I don't think I can trust Puck with this information. "I can't say, we're keeping it on the down low for now. I have to ask him first."

"Is it someone I know?"

"Shut up and drive, bitch."

**.o0o.**

After hours of boredom in a room with no social activities, I am able to get out to obtain my lunch. Almost jumping for joy, I rush to the lunchroom ready to give a snappy comment to anyone who looks my way. Unfortunate for the person who came my way, Puck grins at me. Once more wanting to know who I am dating. I was very close to punching him out, but he was saved by his huge girlfriend and was replaced by Mercedes.

"What was with those murderous looks?" She chuckles, getting some tots on her plate as I get some chicken nuggets.

"Puck being a dick, what else?" I sigh, grabbing water. "Hey, do you think it'll be okay to tell people about Kurt and I? Without telling others I'm... You know?" I glance around to see who was listening, but so far only some younger kids who probably don't know Kurt.

"I dunno... I know Kurt will be happy to have you say you're together... But the last part is something I can honestly say I had even heard about." She shrugs. "Do what you feel is comfortable; I know Kurt wouldn't want you to push yourself over your limit."

I sigh, paying for my food as I wait for my boyfriend's best friend. "I just don't want people freak out that Kurt is now straight or how I'm probably turning him." Did people freak out when Brit and him dated?

"Please, you shouldn't give a damn what people think. And if they have an issue, I've seen what you do when someone pisses you off." Mercedes grins.

Letting a smirk take form I nod in agreement. Screw other people. While walking Mercedes to the Gleek table, I see Finn glaring at me. I ignore the bastard and give Brit a hug before I go back to the room of boredom.

**.o0o.**

"Well Lopez, since you are in ISS, I have to let you off the team." Coach says, shaking her head.

"Why? I didn't do anything!" No, _nononono_! This cannot be happening! My mother is gonna freak out on me even more. _Fuck_!

"You won't be able to do practice nor will you be allowed to do extra activity for school, in short you are worthless to the team and off it. You may hand in your uniform tomorrow."

She turns to leave, as I shockingly stare at her Track Suit back. She can't be serious though... Oh God, what if Mister Shue kicks me out of glee! I look over at my ISS teacher who is pretty much on Facebook. Taking out my cell I send Kurt the horrible news then placing it between my legs waiting for him to reply. Though, even in a time like this, Kurt probably is not gonna text me while knowing I shouldn't be...

**.o0o. Kurt POV .o0o.**

My cell vibrates rather loudly as Blaine finishes telling me about his new crush, honestly that boy has a new crush every day. Trying to be polite I wait for him to finish but I feel an urge to look at my phone. It's a bad habit for my generation to be to hooked on them but seriously my friends are so far away and my boyfriend is going through such a hard time. I let a smile form thinking about Travis. Starting to daydream on how he will be when we get out of high school, how he will start looking more like a guy, starting on T, getting surgery, and... Possible the sex to come. Flushing, I remember all the pornographic videos I had found.

"Do I even want to know?" Blaine starts sighing, looking over at his two close friends. "What do you think he's thinking of?" I send him a glare as he winks at me. Ugh, Blaine.

"Well, you did say he has a boyfriend." David teases, smirking a bit as I feel my face burning. "You guys did anything yet?"

"Shut it, David!" I hiss, only earning chuckles around our table. "Seriously, what Travis and I do is none of your business." I cross my arms and tilt my head high.

"Kurt we are just teasing." Wes smiles, "They do it all the time with Ashley and I relationship. Yesterday Blaine and Matthew send me condoms."

Blinking at Blaine, he just smirks but shrugs innocently. _Oh my Gawd_, please don't let them do that to us or anything worst. "It was Matthew's idea."

"You didn't need to buy small though." Wes frowns, looking uncomfortable.

"My bad," David sighs, "You Asians have small dicks, I just assumed it was." Wes sharply turns his head to glare at his head and starts off a rant, which I tune out as I pull my cell to see what I missed. Frowning, I see what new news has my boyfriend probably stressing over. "What's wrong, Kurt?" David says, trying to also break away from his friend's abuse.

"Travis was kicked off the Cheerios." I announce, trying to think of soothing words to tell him. "He really likes being on the squad," At least I think so.

"Well, maybe the Coach will take him back?" Blaine frowns.

"No. Once you are off, you are off for good." I sigh, texting Travis that it probably is for the best since at least he doesn't have to wear a skirt. "He's a bit scared he might be kicked out of Glee also." I also write that of course Mr. Schue wouldn't do that to him.

"Poor guy." Blaine frowns, "We should do something nice for him."

"Erm, I don't know ab-"

"A party!" David inputs his choice, smirking wildly.

"Um, no." Blaine rolls his eyes, "He doesn't even know you."

"And he knows you?" The dark skin kid pouts, crossing his arms.

"We Facebooked each other." He smirks, and then looks over at me. "We should go on a shopping date."

"Oh! That's a great idea!" I smile, "I'll call him about it after classes are over to hear him surprised!"

**.o0o.**

After the Warbler's successful practice; I go into my room to have a quite chat with my boyfriend, knowing he should be free to talk by now. I wait a few rings before I hear the lovely voice of Travis, which is ruined by his greeting.

"Yo, wazzup?" He sighs, sounding bored.

"Really?" I pout, but a little fearful the way he answers me. Is he already bored with me?

"Whoa, Kurt? My bad! I didn't see the name and oh jeeze, babe, I am sorry." Travis panics a bit, causing me to smile. "I'm just stressed out and tired."

"It's fine, Trav, don't worry about it. I actually want to say that Blaine and I were wondering if you want to go shopping this weekend, for men's clothing. I know you don't have a lot and we are ready to make a sexy boy come out of you."

I hear him chuckle, tiredly but still cheerful. "I'm pretty sexy already, dude."

I let him slid with calling me dude as I start to say, "The hobo look is only going to last for awhile, plus you need nice clothing for special events. Trust me, Travis, you'll look amazing and you don't even have to pay, my gift to you."

"I rather you save your money for something useful."

"Oh, like what?"

"Like my penis." He laughs as I gasp. "I bet your face is red!"

I have no idea if it is, but it feels like it. "I thought you had one..." Remembering back to the purple faux cock he talked about.

"Yeah, well... We need a size you will want. We can get any thickness and any length your needs need." He whispers into my ear with raw need, "Trust me, it makes the experience better."

"Well, I... Um..."

"I'm joking, babe." He laughs huskily, "My cock makes every cum, plus it's how you use it. And trust me, I use it well."

"Travis!" I gasp, only to hear him laugh again. "What am I going to do with you?"

"Take me out shopping, apparently. But... Since my mum will probably be home at the time, we need to think of a plan so I can bind."

"Don't worry about that, We will stop at Mercedes for you to get ready."

_TBC?_

* * *

Oh, you guys have an idea of a haircut? I can't think of anything cute/sexy for him.

_Btw… This fandom is getting me angry with the ship wars… Thank Goodness people hardly ship Humpez... ;_; I would hate to see this pairing get ripped apart._


End file.
